LucasArts have announced that Jim Ward has reclaimed the reigns as president of the company. This follows the recent announcement that Mr. Ward will be taking over as CEO of the Pheonix Symphony Orchestra as well.
NO MORE MONKEY SOUP FOR YOU!
Unverified claims from insiders at the Skywalker range say that Jim has worked along side the Beelzebub to set a five year plan in motion and will personally over see production of the following:
* Three new installments of 'The Force Unleashed' (which, in keeping with TFU 2's DLC are rumoured to allow the player to sabre-dice Luke Skywalker, decapitate Princess Leia and in an epic finale, butt-rape Chewbacca (whilst the emporer watches on and plucks a space-banjo).
* A sequel to 'Star Wars: Bounty Hunter' (Wii), where the player will assume the role of Jango Fett's long lost brother; Mango Fettuccine, whilst blasting his way through levels based on popular Star Wars locales (including a brief jaunt through Aunt Beru's knicker draw).
* Motion controls at the ready with 'Kinecting with Ewoks' (360), where fans the world over are sure to enjoy taking part in the everyday life of the galaxcy's most beloved furry pals...
º Feel the Force, as you softly braid Wickett's fur with your own fingers.
º Feel the Ryhthm, as you join in with the cheeky critters rendition of the classic song, Nub-Nub.
º Feel the Love, as you settle down after the hectic hustle and bustle of everyday life, by curling up
with your native friends and giving them a passionate cuddle with your own arms.
* The best selling and most hilarious cross-over series ever continues with 'Lego Star Wars IV: The Holiday Special' (Multi-Format). Playable characters are set to include Chewbacca's son, Lumpawarrump and everyone's favourite transvestite chef, Gormaanda. Not to mention a drug addled Princess Leia.
* A highly anticipated follow up in the form of 'Super Bombad Racing 2: Bombad to the Bone' (PSP)
* An all new spin-off arrives with the Wii dancing game 'Smooth Moves with Jar Jar: Wii-sa Keeping Fit-sa'.
* Nintendo DS owners have reason to rejoice with the frantic fun offered by 'Dexter Jettster's Diner Dash', in which the player takes control of rebel leader Mon Mother, who is moonlighting as a waitress in the Coruscant Diner. Players will need to be quick on the draw with their stylus', if they hope to serve all 200 of the hungry customers (including special guest star Henry Winkler, who will be providing the voice of hip alien CoolDak Fonzee).
* Of course LucasArts aren't one to ignore their rich heritage and as such they will include Guybrush Threepwood as an unlockable character in 'Masters of Teras Kasi 2: The Rise and Fall of Master Windu, due 2025.
Meanwhile, an unnamed source over at the Pheonix Symphony Orchestra camp had this to say; 'We really don't understand what our new CEO is doing. He just keeps insisting that we only play music from the Star Wars movies and going on about economic realities and market conditions'!