I'm going to create my own Jurassic park

[asyncus]

with real dino's. I already have the dna and a bunch of crazy low-paid bulgarian scientists. Whos with me!!! I'm thinking of central London.

The concept I have is sort of like an amusementpark slash MMA-event.

[waroftheworlds01]

I just bought the closed down Six Flags in New Orleans Louisiana If you would rather build it there. After we've made a deal about shared profits of course.

[Faceslasher]

I just bought the closed down Six Flags in New Orleans Louisiana If you would rather build it there. After we've made a deal about shared profits of course.

Hey HEY. I bought it! Im making a Zombie park.

[robotpo]

with real dino's. I already have the dna and a bunch of crazy low-paid bulgarian scientists. Whos with me!!! I'm thinking of central London.

The concept I have is sort of like an amusementpark slash MMA-event.

You could put in in Crystal Palace Park, but only if you engineer the dinosaurs to look like the things that Waterhouse Hawkins built!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crystal_Palace_Park#Crystal_Palace_Park

[Martin McFly]

with real dino's. I already have the dna and a bunch of crazy low-paid bulgarian scientists. Whos with me!!! I'm thinking of central London.

The concept I have is sort of like an amusementpark slash MMA-event.

You're going to need someone who knows, ah, chaos thory.

[DustyBoy87]

You create your own park, I'll steal embryos, and then I'll genetically modify all the dinosaurs with weapon attachments and grenade dispensers.

[asyncus]

@Waroftheworld. Yes, but instead of sharing profits. I dont care about the money. If I get the limbs of the tourists, its fine by me. I want my own private basement where I can do very strange, ultra-illegal and scary experiments. This is my hidden agenda, but Im not telling anyone. But yes, in our park, what do we need, besides a lot of weird people.

[anashastar]

Let's do this! I want to supervise the hatchery :D

[piccobello]

Side B is mine!

[FPug]

I'll work with voice overs and tours. :D

[anashastar]

I'll work with voice overs and tours. :D

Make sure the spare no expense for your voice overs!

[FPug]

Make sure the spare no expense for your voice overs!

I'd do it for free.:)

[evolution_rex]

This is my hidden agenda, but Im not telling anyone.
your doing a good job not telling anyone.

[waroftheworlds01]

I own a jeep too. So there's that. lol

[Martin McFly]

So far we have:

-Bulgarian scientists
-A supervisor for the hatchery
-A voice over/tour guide
-A Site B owner
-Dr. Grant
-A kid with a jeep

We're off to a great start.

[Krokery]

I'm an experienced park warden. I assure you I will provide great security. Tasers on full charge.

[Martin McFly]

I'm an experienced park warden.

What are your credentials?

[Bombillazo]

Im good at math.

[trocks]

I'll start splicing DNA strands together and see what I can come up with.

[Shadowknight1]

Because of the behavior systems in complex systems, I pronounce the park a failure without seeing any precautions or what-not that you have in place. :p

[trocks]

Because of the behavior systems in complex systems, I pronounce the park a failure without seeing any precautions or what-not that you have in place. :p

I hope you're not proven right by a coincidental case of poorly planned espionage.

[RexMaster]

Well, I am sorry to ruin your dream but if I were you I would stop where you are... the reason is that I have already succeeded in the task of recreating dinosaurs. I have been researching it for 10 years and the park will open next year, that is if the lawyers dont kill me first. Its really specatular, I spared no expense! Plus, I have not employed anyone named Nedry so I think im fine, but I am a little suspicious about Dennis, our computer technician who just left to the vending machine with a shaving cream can. Anyway, no worries, our park will open soon so all of you can enjoy it!!! :D

[asyncus]

We will definitely have a huge restaurant filled with Jell-O

[FPug]

Well, I am sorry to ruin your dream but if I were you I would stop where you are... the reason is that I have already succeeded in the task of recreating dinosaurs. I have been researching it for 10 years and the park will open next year, that is if the lawyers dont kill me first. Its really specatular, I spared no expense! Plus, I have not employed anyone named Nedry so I think im fine, but I am a little suspicious about Dennis, our computer technician who just left to the vending machine with a shaving cream can. Anyway, no worries, our park will open soon so all of you can enjoy it!!! :D

.....................But I need a job! :'(

[Bombillazo]

I hope you're not proven right by a coincidental case of poorly planned espionage.

LOL!!! this sentence is too funny XD Alliteration ftw

[anashastar]

So wait there are competitive dinosaur parks??? Oh no stuffs about to go down D:

[DustyBoy87]

I would make sure there would be locking mechanisms on the vehicle doors.

[RaptorsRwk]

If anybody needs a resident paleontologist for there park i have seen all the movies and read both books so i assume i am over qualified.

[xcruiser]

I would like design the buildings.:D

[SpielbergFan]

If you need an automation/electrotechnology engineer, that's what I'm studying.:)

[WARP10CK]

I will be guy that checks the shaving cream cans just incase Customs has not checked it enough.

Further more I have an idea for the river tour the Megaladon a giant white shark that would make Jaws hide in shame.

We are gonna need a bigger boat just got a whole new meaning

http://www.badmovies.org/movies/sharkattackiii/sharkattackiii5.jpg

[Martin McFly]

Our staff list now consists of:

-Bulgarian scientists
-A supervisor for the hatchery
-A voice over/tour guide
-A Site B owner
-DNA Splicer
-A kid with a jeep
-A math nerd
-One park warden without credentials
-An overqualified paleontologist
-Someone who is able to install locking mechanisms into the jeeps jeep
-An architect
-A student training to become an automation/electrotechnology engineer
-Shaving cream can inspector
-Head of Holding Onto One's Game Warden
-Head of Public Relations
-Slightly suspicious and seemingly harmless janitor
-Dinosaur nutritionist

What can possibly go wrong?

[WARP10CK]

Our staff list now consists of:

-Bulgarian scientists
-A supervisor for the hatchery
-A voice over/tour guide
-A Site B owner
-DNA Splicer
-A kid with a jeep
-A math nerd
-One park warden without credentials
-An overqualified paleontologist
-Someone who is able to install locking mechanisms into the jeeps jeep
-An architect
-A student training to become an automation/electrotechnology engineer
-Shaving cream can inspector

What can possibly go wrong?


We are off to too a great start here :)

[xcruiser]

Have we already an Island in mind..? Or on the mainland..?

I prefer a Island.

[anashastar]

If anybody needs a resident paleontologist for there park i have seen all the movies and read both books so i assume i am over qualified.

OMG I couldn't stop laughing when I saw this XD

But Wait! We need some form of Human security!!! We are missing a Muldoon!:eek:

[Martin McFly]

Have we already an Island in mind..? Or on the mainland..?

This shouldn't even be a question. I thought that when everyone signed on, they were aware that this act against God would reside on an island.

[anashastar]

But the thread creator said Central London :D

[Martin McFly]

I nominate myself as the head of general park and staffing design. Any opposition? I didn't think so. Since my job entails picking the location, I say that it's on an island.

[asyncus]

Great list mr McFly. I just wonder. Who is flying the heli's? And I was thinking of getting some Venture Capitalists- the kind of ones that when things starting to heat up, always wanting to visit out-door toilets. I kind of like those.

Mr. McFly, you pick the island. Ive got my basement. Im satisfied.

[RaptorsRwk]

As the head over qualified paleontologist i am going to need a giant trailer,a hat,flannel shirt,a raptor claw, assistant head over qualified paleontologist,and a gun(because everybody knows that when the sh!t hits the fan paleontologists know exactly what to do)

[Shadowknight1]

But the thread creator said Central London :D

Of course! The British Isles, naturally. ;)

[trocks]

This shouldn't even be a question. I thought that when everyone signed on, they were aware that this act against God would reside on an island.

No no no... The last time someone did this on an island, it failed horribly! The clear solution is mainland New England. I suggest the old abandoned Rocky Point Park in Rhode Island (which is not actually an island, by the way). I think some of the old ticket booths haven't burnt down yet.

[Martin McFly]

No no no... The last time someone did this on an island, it failed horribly! The clear solution is mainland New England. I suggest the old abandoned Rocky Point Park in Rhode Island (which is not actually an island, by the way). I think some of the old ticket booths haven't burnt down yet.

But if our park is on an island, we can charge extra for the transportation to and from. If we have living and breathing dinosaurs on our island, people will pay the extra fee. In addition, if we choose an island, we don't have to worry about any property damages in neighbouring areas. I'm not saying that there will be but it doesn't hurt to make some precautions. Funding is absolutely necessary when completing a project of this magnitude.

We need funding if we plan to expand our park's features and the extra revenue will come in handy. Obviously we will have to add a few extra safety features to ensure our park does not follow a path of destruction and terror like the orginal Jurassic Park did but safety does come first.

Great list mr McFly. I just wonder. Who is flying the heli's? And I was thinking of getting some Venture Capitalists- the kind of ones that when things starting to heat up, always wanting to visit out-door toilets. I kind of like those.

Mr. McFly, you pick the island. Ive got my basement. Im satisfied.

I like the way you think.

As the head over qualified paleontologist i am going to need a giant trailer,a hat,flannel shirt,a raptor claw, assistant head over qualified paleontologist,and a gun(because everybody knows that when the sh!t hits the fan paleontologists know exactly what to do)

Done. Since I'm not in charge of financials, contact the thread's creator for all the billing and your employment needs.

[coolguy721]

Our staff list now consists of:

-Bulgarian scientists
-A supervisor for the hatchery
-A voice over/tour guide
-A Site B owner
-DNA Splicer
-A kid with a jeep
-A math nerd
-One park warden without credentials
-An overqualified paleontologist
-Someone who is able to install locking mechanisms into the jeeps jeep
-An architect
-A student training to become an automation/electrotechnology engineer
-Shaving cream can inspector

What can possibly go wrong?

can i be the janitor?

[Martin McFly]

can i be the janitor?

That depends.

Are you going to be one of those janitors that end up dancing in the halls and regularly sparking arguments with fire extinguishers? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9KQQrNDawM)

Or one of those quirky janitors that say little but contribute to the overall state of the park? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4iDsuVlVaU)

[RexMaster]

Our staff list now consists of:

-Bulgarian scientists
-A supervisor for the hatchery
-A voice over/tour guide
-A Site B owner
-DNA Splicer
-A kid with a jeep
-A math nerd
-One park warden without credentials
-An overqualified paleontologist
-Someone who is able to install locking mechanisms into the jeeps jeep
-An architect
-A student training to become an automation/electrotechnology engineer
-Shaving cream can inspector

What can possibly go wrong?


Well I am sorry to say that my park is already complete, and is opening next year. We dont need all of those people btw because our park was designed to be able to run off of minimal staff by our computer dude... so HA!

[Martin McFly]

Well I am sorry to say that my park is already complete, and is opening next year. We dont need all of those people btw because our park was designed to be able to run off of minimal staff by our computer dude... so HA!

Ah, so you've chosen to have your park run with technology and one human computer expert as opposed to different humans of varying skills working collectively as one.

http://a3.l3-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/115/7b194439386b423fa6b210c3df5379fc/m.jpg

Sounds like a flawless plan. Best of luck on your new venture.

[coolguy721]

That depends.

Are you going to be one of those janitors that end up dancing in the halls and regularly sparking arguments with fire extinguishers? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9KQQrNDawM)

Or one of those quirky janitors that say little but contribute to the overall state of the park? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4iDsuVlVaU)

The janitor that steals all the embryos when he is alone

[Martin McFly]

The janitor that steals all the embryos when he is alone

...

...

...

You're hired.

[RaptorsRwk]

Great now all i ask is that i have full acess to the park and its systems as well as the dinos so i can...er study them also because i do not trust computers (call me old fashion)

[Bombillazo]

I'm done with the analysis of success rate for the park and tendencies for audience reception. Statistics say this park has a 3.1415926535 8979323846 2643383279 5028841971 6939937510 5820974944 5923078164 0628620899 8628034825 3421170679 8214808651 3282306647 0938446095 5058223172 5359408128 4811174502 8410270193 8521105559 6446229489 5493038196 4428810975 6659334461 2847564823 3786783165 2712019091 4564856692 3460348610 4543266482 1339360726 0249141273 7245870066 0631558817 4881520920 9628292540 9171536436 7892590360 0113305305 4882046652 1384146951 9415116094 3305727036 5759591953 0921861173 8193261179 3105118548 0744623799 6274956735 1885752724 8912279381 chance of being destroyed by an unfortunate case of bad timing every time you have dinosaurs in your park.


But 100% satisfaction guaranteed to work otherwise. Only ratings will blow.

[Martin McFly]

I'm done with the analysis of success rate for the park and tendencies for audience reception. Statistics say this park has a 3.1415926535 8979323846 2643383279 5028841971 6939937510 5820974944 5923078164 0628620899 8628034825 3421170679 8214808651 3282306647 0938446095 5058223172 5359408128 4811174502 8410270193 8521105559 6446229489 5493038196 4428810975 6659334461 2847564823 3786783165 2712019091 4564856692 3460348610 4543266482 1339360726 0249141273 7245870066 0631558817 4881520920 9628292540 9171536436 7892590360 0113305305 4882046652 1384146951 9415116094 3305727036 5759591953 0921861173 8193261179 3105118548 0744623799 6274956735 1885752724 8912279381 chance of being destroyed by an unfortunate case of bad timing every time you have dinosaurs in your park.


But 100% satisfaction guaranteed to work otherwise. Only ratings will blow.

Being the mathematician that I am, I have to ask how you came to the conclusion that Pi would be the best representation of our failure rate.

[FPug]

I'd also like to be head of public relations.

[Martin McFly]

Public relations? In that case, all I want you to do is answer the question listed below to the best of your ability.

Why are manhole covers round?

[corruptbiggins]

I'm gonna create my own park! With blackjack and hookers! In fact, forget the park!

[Martin McFly]

I'm gonna create my own park! With blackjack and hookers! In fact, forget the park!

You're a man with ambition and simple tastes; I respect that.

[RaptorsRwk]

I'd also like to be head of public relations.

If he's going to be head of public relations i wanna be the poster boy for jurassic park. Nothing says come to our park like a poster of a paleontologist holding a shotgun.

[Armakuni]

A park would be nice enough, but in my opinion the ultimate goal should be managing to successfully transplant human brains into T-Rex bodies.

Something that would obviously make the world a more perfect place... evolution managed to come up with much cooler looking bodies way back then, before those meteors or whatever it was put an end to that... which gave rise to much better intelligence, but trapped within much more lame bodies.

So we should combine the best of both, keeping our intelligence intact while changing from our crappy human bodies into awesome gigantic T-Rex ones.

Potential naysayers should simply be eaten by the new, superior T-Rex people.

[coolguy721]

...

...

...

You're hired.

woot!

[RexMaster]

Ah, so you've chosen to have your park run with technology and one human computer expert as opposed to different humans of varying skills working collectively as one.

http://a3.l3-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/115/7b194439386b423fa6b210c3df5379fc/m.jpg

Sounds like a flawless plan. Best of luck on your new venture.



I love this guy! There is nothing more to it!

[Masta23]

You are going to need somebody to feed the dinosaurs...plenty of cows and donkeys are required. I will be in charge of that.

[Martin McFly]

I love this guy! There is nothing more to it!

Why thank you. I appreciate your support and know that I love you too, anonymous computer user under the alias 'RexMaster'.

[FPug]

Why are manhole covers round?

That question can be answered with another question...Why aren't they rectanguler?:cool:

[Martin McFly]

That question can be answered with another question...Why aren't they rectanguler?:cool:

A round manhole cover cannot fall through its circular opening, whereas a square manhole cover may fall in if it were inserted diagonally in the hole.

I do like your approach to the question though. We need people like you in public relations.

Without consideration to the thread owner's personal opinion, I hereby offer you employment.

[FPug]

A round manhole cover cannot fall through its circular opening, whereas a square manhole cover may fall in if it were inserted diagonally in the hole.

I do like your approach to the question though. We need people like you in public relations.

Without consideration to the thread owner's personal opinion, I hereby offer you employment.

HECK YES!!!! I won't let you down!:D

[Bombillazo]

Being the mathematician that I am, I have to ask how you came to the conclusion that Pi would be the best representation of our failure rate.

Euler's Identity

[Martin McFly]

Euler's Identity

Nice to see another mathematician roaming the forums.

[EvilDeadFan]

I call game warden if no one hasn't yet! Oh... I have credentials... eh screw it, I'll be the head of the department of Holding onto one's posterior!

[Martin McFly]

I call game warden if no one hasn't yet! Oh... I have credentials... eh screw it, I'll be the head of the department of Holding onto one's posterior!

Someone has been hired for park warden (protection of natural, cultural and historic resources) but if you have credentials, I say you're now in charge of the park's wildlife. Oh, I'll throw in the other position you wanted too.

In fact, I'll fuse the positions together.

Welcome to the team, Head of Holding Onto One's Game Warden.

[RaptorsRwk]

Our staff list now consists of:

-Bulgarian scientists
-A supervisor for the hatchery
-A voice over/tour guide
-A Site B owner
-DNA Splicer
-A kid with a jeep
-A math nerd
-One park warden without credentials
-An overqualified paleontologist
-Someone who is able to install locking mechanisms into the jeeps jeep
-An architect
-A student training to become an automation/electrotechnology engineer
-Shaving cream can inspector

What can possibly go wrong?


Hold on we have all the heavy hitters so far but whos going to supply the cheap labor? We need tired, low payed, overworked, demoralized, broken spirited people to actually build the park.

[Martin McFly]

Hold on we have all the heavy hitters so far but whos going to supply the cheap labor? We need tired, low payed, overworked, demoralized, broken spirited people to actually build the park.

I know but where are we going to find such a large group of philosophy majors? *dodges tomatoes*

[RaptorsRwk]

I know but where are we going to find such a large group of philosophy majors? *dodges tomatoes*


At home with their mothers asking the all important question "Why?.....Did i not choose a different major?" *drums then cricket*

[asyncus]

The bulgarian scientists has went out on a strike Im afraid. I accidently miscalculated the amount of the cigarettes they usually get as their monthly payment. My fault. Im getting a new shipment tomorrow afternoon if oversized Gregor at the harbor is not unconscious. Its thursday, so it should be fine.

FPug, welcome! You will be a huge asset!

Yes, building the park, but I think fences and such things are overrated. Dinos need their freedom, just like kangeroos. Some kind of fence perhaps. How many workers do we need to hire?

[nagasadow]

Hold on we have all the heavy hitters so far but whos going to supply the cheap labor? We need tired, low payed, overworked, demoralized, broken spirited people to actually build the park.

well u can get nemas relatives to do it

[RaptorsRwk]

The bulgarian scientists has went out on a strike Im afraid. I accidently miscalculated the amount of the cigarettes they usually get as their monthly payment. My fault. Im getting a new shipment tomorrow afternoon if oversized Gregor at the harbor is not unconscious. Its thursday, so it should be fine.

FPug, welcome! You will be a huge asset!

Yes, building the park, but I think fences and such things are overrated. Dinos need their freedom, just like kangeroos. Some kind of fence perhaps. How many workers do we need to hire?

Depending on wether or not they have good work ethic and wether or not we have to pay them in cigs like your bulgarians or with beer and drugs (so many variables im afraid) but i think a good guess is about 50

[Martin McFly]

The bulgarian scientists has went out on a strike Im afraid. I accidently miscalculated the amount of the cigarettes they usually get as their monthly payment. My fault. Im getting a new shipment tomorrow afternoon if oversized Gregor at the harbor is not unconscious. Its thursday, so it should be fine.

That's a relief to hear. For a second, I thought the project would have to be delayed.

FPug, welcome! You will be a huge asset!

I'm convinced that they will be too. I'm glad that you approve of my choice in staff, sir.

Yes, building the park, but I think fences and such things are overrated. Dinos need their freedom, just like kangeroos. Some kind of fence perhaps. How many workers do we need to hire?

You should consult our math expert, Bombillazo. RaptorsRwk seems to possess talents in the mathematical field too.

[RaptorsRwk]

That's a relief to hear. For a second, I thought the project would have to be delayed.



I'm convinced that they will be too. I'm glad that you approve of my choice in staff, sir.



You should consult our math expert, Bombillazo. RaptorsRwk seems to possess talents in the mathematical field too.

Thank you I have been known to dabble in the math field from time to time. I'm a jack of all trades if I do say so myself and I stand by my estimate give or take 10 workers because no matter the size of the park they can be overworked and are expendable. And if need be I can have my assistant watch over them as they work(yes I have an assistant. Shouldn't everybody)

[RexMaster]

Why thank you. I appreciate your support and know that I love you too, anonymous computer user under the alias 'RexMaster'.

Haha! Its good to know the feeling is mutual!

*Starts up tracking software and begins tracking IP address*

[anashastar]

Seeing as I supervise the Hatchery and help the Dinosaurs grow up, I wouldn't mind also being the Dinosaur Doctor. We can't have sick dinosaurs roaming about the island now can we?

[asyncus]

Oh we are going to get so rich and famous! I love all ideas! I -- like -- it. But what name will the Park have? Any ideas?

Cant we find some island where there are minerals, like diamonds, gold, silver so we can hire; I believe the political correct word is, hmm i dunno. But midgets. So they can start working in the mines. I want golden teeth and then starting up a side-area for my pimping business. Imagin a rainy day where no dinos are spottet, the tourists that have spend thousends and thousends of dollars starting to questioning the whole trip.

Then I step in and say: Hey mr Kowagatchi, You seem sad! if the touristguys name is Kowagatchi that is, It could also be Ray, Randy, James, Stephany, Sven. He say - Yes were are all the dinos?? I havent seen any dino at all during the whole visit.
Then I say. I got a little treat for you mr Kowagatchi. Wanting company? And as Kowagatchi is a family father he may decline, but then I say. -We use plan B, Family can go away in many forms, this island is huge. Kowagatchi says yes. No more family,

You say, what has this to do with a dinosaurpark or even smart thinking? Well, nothing. But I see this as recreation-time- and we must have some kind of recreation, no?

[xcruiser]

We also need cars for the park. I thinking of Audi Q7 as tour vehicle.

and of course people for maintain the cars.

[Armakuni]

http://hooniverse.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/flintstone-car.jpg
How about this one? :p

[waroftheworlds01]

We're going to make a fortune with this place...

[Davies]

I'm gonna create my own park! With blackjack and hookers! In fact, forget the park!

Oh man, I wanted to go for the Futurama gag but I figured that someone would beat me to it. I was right.

[Bombillazo]

We're going to make a fortune with this place...

If by fortune you mean 8.00 bucks and hour, basic med care without dental and 12 days of vacation yearly, yeah

[Davies]

If by fortune you mean 8.00 bucks and hour, basic med care without dental and 12 days of vacation yearly, yeah

Don't forget the free 'You don't have to be a dinosaur to work here but it helps' badge.

[Bombillazo]

Don't forget the free 'You don't have to be a dinosaur to work here but it helps' badge.

No, the park owner said he'd give it only to the first 10 people that wanted to be part of his crazy idea... I came in too late though :(

[EvilDeadFan]

As the Head of the Department of holding onto one's game warden, I must advise not leaning against the fence by any means, as you will not be able to hold onto your game warden nor your behind, as they will both be bitten off severely. Now you know, and knowing is half the battle!

[Bombillazo]

As the Head of the Department of holding onto one's game warden, I must advise not leaning against the fence by any means, as you will not be able to hold onto your game warden nor your behind, as they will both be bitten off severely. Now you know, and knowing is half the battle!

G.I. Joe!

I can also work as PR Manager!

Jurassic Park! If you thought Hippo's took big dumps, wait till you see a Brachiosaurus pile of S#!t!


PS: Why does my browser want to correct Brachiosaurus as Brontosaurus!?!? Thats no longer used!

[RaptorsRwk]

Well im ready. Anybody know when the boat leaves?

[Shadowknight1]

Oh man, I wanted to go for the Futurama gag but I figured that someone would beat me to it. I was right.

Fine, I'm gonna clone my own dinosaurs! With blackjack and hookers! In Fact, forget the dinosaurs! And the blackjack! Ah, screw the whole thing.

[waroftheworlds01]

My brother in law build a chicken coop for his chickens. I'm sure if I asked he would make some Dinosaur enclosures for us.

Martin McFly, we need a staff update. lol

[Davies]

Fine, I'm gonna clone my own dinosaurs! With blackjack and hookers! In Fact, forget the dinosaurs! And the blackjack! Ah, screw the whole thing.

Cloning dinosaur hookers doesn't tempt you out of curiosity?

[Martin McFly]

Martin McFly, we need a staff update. lol

-Bulgarian scientists (pending)
-A supervisor for the hatchery
-A voice over/tour guide
-A Site B owner
-DNA Splicer
-A kid with a jeep
-A math nerd
-One park warden without credentials
-An overqualified paleontologist
-Someone who is able to install locking mechanisms into the jeeps jeep
-An architect
-A student training to become an automation/electrotechnology engineer
-Shaving cream can inspector
-Head of Holding Onto One's Game Warden
-Head of Public Relations
-Public Relations officer
-Slightly suspicious and seemingly harmless janitor
-Dinosaur nutritionist
-Dinosaur containment construction worker
-Temporary Part time assistant
-An experienced systems programmer

[Tyrannosaur87]

Additional Park Rangers should be needed to assist the Warden. I volunteer, no payment required (although it would be nice)

[Martin McFly]

I volunteer, no payment required (although it would be nice)

How about... *fishes through pockets* $5.42, a receipt for the sports almanac I bought a while ago and this Barbasol can?

http://www.myjurassicpark.com/jurassicpark-cryocan.jpg

...Why is that in my pocket?

Oh and the DNA is included.

[Tyrannosaur87]

How about... *fishes through pockets* $5.42, a receipt for the sports almanac I bought a while ago and this Barbasol can?

http://www.myjurassicpark.com/jurassicpark-cryocan.jpg

...Why is that in my pocket?

Oh and the DNA is included.

I'll take it!

[RaptorsRwk]

...Why is that in my pocket?

Oh and the DNA is included.

I should probably take that. You know since "studying" them is part of my job.

[Martin McFly]

I'll take it!

Excellent.

I should probably take that. You know since "studying" them is part of my job.

How about we act like mature adults here and split the DNA between the two of you? That way, everyone learns a valuable moral lesson and we can get on with the rest of the day.

[Tyrannosaur87]

How about we act like mature adults here and split the DNA between the two of you? That way, everyone learns a valuable moral lesson and can get on with the rest of the day.

Works for me. Not like I'm gonna pull a Dennis Nedry on the park...or will I? Nah. Working with Dinosaurs up close and personal is enough of a reward for me as opposed to the potential billions I could get for embryo's

[RaptorsRwk]

How about we act like mature adults here and split the DNA between the two of you? That way, everyone learns a valuable moral lesson and can get on with the rest of the day.

That'll work or if they're up to it they can also be my part time assistant. I sent my full time assistant to the island early to scout around but haven't heard from him since :confused:....stange.

I'm sure he's fine.

[Tyrannosaur87]

That'll work or if they're up to it they can also be my part time assistant. I sent my full time assistant to the island early to scout around but haven't heard from him since :confused:....stange.

I'm sure he's fine.

I can deal with being a part time assistant til the park opens. Then I'm off to do my ranger duties. (if it's anything like my halloween costume came out, I'm in for some real fun ;) )

[Martin McFly]

That'll work or if they're up to it they can also be my part time assistant. I sent my full time assistant to the island early to scout around but haven't heard from him since :confused:....stange.

I'm sure he's fine.

No doubt he's too consumed by the fantastical qualities that the island has to offer.

[RaptorsRwk]

I can deal with being a part time assistant til the park opens. Then I'm off to do my ranger duties. (if it's anything like my halloween costume came out, I'm in for some real fun ;) )

Thanks i could really use the help. You know. gotta keep up to date til the opening. And if you're looking for fun just wait until we get to study the raptors up close and personal.

Actually thats what my assistant was supposed to be doing.

No doubt he's screwing around instead of doing his job

[Tyrannosaur87]

Thanks i could really use the help. You know. gotta keep up to date til the opening. And if you're looking for fun just wait until we get to study the raptors up close and personal.

No problem. I look forward to it. As for the Raptors....Are they clever?

[RaptorsRwk]

....Are they clever?


Very. thats what makes them so fascinating:D

[Tyrannosaur87]

Very. thats what makes them so fascinating:D

I'm in. After all, it's not like they can open doors or anything...

[RaptorsRwk]

I'm in. After all, it's not like they can open doors or anything...

Great! I can tell you like to live a little dangerously. But i see no reason to fear my full time assistant had told me before i lost contact that there should only be 3 of them at the most. And we've spared no expense when it comes to security.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Great! I can tell you like to live a little dangerously. But i see no reason to fear my full time assistant had told me before i lost contact that there should only be 3 of them at the most. And we've spared no expense when it comes to security.

Given that I'm being paid just a little over 5 bucks and a few embryo's, I can definitely see that no expense was spared

[RaptorsRwk]

No doubt he's too consumed by the fantastical qualities that the island has to offer.

Or is shirking his work. I'm going to have a serious talk with him about his future employment when he returns from his little vacation.:mad:

[RaptorsRwk]

Given that I'm being paid just a little over 5 bucks and a few embryo's, I can definitely see that no expense was spared

Ofcourse why do you think you only get paid $5. All the money in the budget has gone to security and saftey protocals.(we pay our scientist with cigs)

[Tyrannosaur87]

Ofcourse why do you think you only get paid $5. All the money in the budget has gone to security and saftey protocals.(we pay our scientist with cigs)

Then I'm definitely moving up in the world. As long as we Rangers have some sort of defense mechanism, such as a tranquilizer gun or an electric net, (of course, we can't afford to truly harm the animals) I'm good to go

[Martin McFly]

Given that I'm being paid just a little over 5 bucks and a few embryo's, I can definitely see that no expense was spared

Hey! You also got a receipt...

Ofcourse why do you think you only get paid $5. All the money in the budget has gone to security and saftey protocals.(we pay our scientist with cigs)

This guy knows exactly how this organization is run.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Hey! You also got a receipt...





Very true. I can now do my taxes with it!

[RaptorsRwk]

This guy knows exactly how this organization is run.

Thanks i try to stay in the loop:)

[Martin McFly]

Thanks i try to stay in the loop:)

Good work. I'll be sure to reward you with customized pencils for your desk.

[RaptorsRwk]

Good work. I'll be sure to reward you with customized pencils for your desk.

Really sweet! I hope they have dino heads as the eraser!

[Martin McFly]

Really sweet! I hope they have dino heads as the eraser!

That and it comes with a dinosaur coloring book.

[RaptorsRwk]

That and it comes with a dinosaur coloring book.

Sweeeeet! This is basically a promotion. I won't let you down i will be the best dino colorer/drawer ever and will be a productive member of this park.


Probably

[RaptorsRwk]

Then I'm definitely moving up in the world. As long as we Rangers have some sort of defense mechanism, such as a tranquilizer gun or an electric net, (of course, we can't afford to truly harm the animals) I'm good to go
You'll also get a hat and shorts. And if you play your cards right a shotgun but it's mostly for show you'll never actually need to use it I'm sure

[Tyrannosaur87]

You'll also get a hat and shorts. And if you play your cards right a shotgun but it's mostly for show you'll never actually need to use it I'm sure

Works for me. (Already have an airsoft SPAS 12 with the folding stock, so I know what I'm doing as far as showing off)

[RaptorsRwk]

Works for me. (Already have an airsoft SPAS 12 with the folding stock, so I know what I'm doing as far as showing off)

Nice I myself was given a rocket launcher upon being hired I don't expect to be using it but it's fun to scare the Bulgarian scientists with it.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Nice I myself was given a rocket launcher upon being hired I don't expect to be using it but it's fun to scare the Bulgarian scientists with it.

Motivational leadership. I can see why Mr. McFly is paying you so elegantly

[RaptorsRwk]

Motivational leadership. I can see why Mr. McFly is paying you so elegantly

Yes well I believe in this organization just as he does and well I find it produces results (even though I don't understand what they're yelling when I point it at them.)

[Tyrannosaur87]

Yes well I believe in this organization just as he does and well I find it produces results (even though I don't understand what they're yelling when I point it at them.)

Fear. It gets stuff done.

[RaptorsRwk]

Fear. It gets stuff done.

I prefer to think of it as incentive or maybe encouragement

[Tyrannosaur87]

I prefer to think of it as incentive or maybe encouragement

That works too

[Tyrannosaur87]

I prefer to think of it as incentive or maybe encouragement

That works too

[rembem]

Hi. I am an experienced systems programmer. (I know unix.) Can I help you build an all powerful camera control system for the park, so no one can walk about unseen to steal dinosaur embryos?

[asyncus]

Perfect Rembem! It would not hurt if you had an extra eye on our somewhat unstable janitor also. An additional camera just for that? :)

[Martin McFly]

Hi. I am an experienced systems programmer. (I know unix.) Can I help you build an all powerful camera control system for the park, so no one can walk about unseen to steal dinosaur embryos?

Absolutely. Security is our top priority and having an experienced systems programmer on our team is vital to the park's success.

Just make sure you leave a full list of the various security passwords in my mailbox.

[RaptorsRwk]

Hi. I am an experienced systems programmer. (I know unix.) Can I help you build an all powerful camera control system for the park, so no one can walk about unseen to steal dinosaur embryos?

Great! This organiztion of ours just keeps growing.

[asyncus]

What about the toy-areas for children/ areas for the little ones. We can make a lot of money in merchandise. I'm thinking small electrical batons for the children. Ofcourse only to put down small animals, like the very smallest dino's in the park, to rabbits, rats, cats etc. Nothing important. Great profit. What do you think?!

[RaptorsRwk]

What about the toy-areas for children/ areas for the little ones. We can make a lot of money in merchandise. I'm thinking small electrical batons for the children. Ofcourse only to put down small animals, like the very smallest dino's in the park, to rabbits, rats, cats etc. Nothing important. Great profit. What do you think?!

I think it's a great idea you've got my vote. We could also sell the tiniest of dinos as pets for the children so they have something to poke with the batons.

[Faceslasher]

Hey can i bring my Zombies to the park. Zombies and Dinosaurs sure will attract customers.

[RaptorsRwk]

Hey can i bring my Zombies to the park. Zombies and Dinosaurs sure will attract customers.

I'm not so sure if the dinos eat the zombies they can have some really bad food poisoning. And who wants to go to a park full of sick dinos.

[Shadowknight1]

I think it's a great idea you've got my vote. We could also sell the tiniest of dinos as pets for the children so they have something to poke with the batons.

Why not just engineer some of the dinos as pets? What kid wouldn't want a pet velociraptor?

[RaptorsRwk]

Why not just engineer some of the dinos as pets? What kid wouldn't want a pet velociraptor?

Never! We create real dinosaurs as they were. Who would want anything more?:)

[Martin McFly]

Why not just engineer some of the dinos as pets? What kid wouldn't want a pet velociraptor?

While this is an intriguing idea, we have to view it from a marketing perspective. If several children purchase these pet dinosaurs, they would have no motivation to re-visit our park. This is the reason why zoos don't have dogs and cats on display; nobody would visit the zoo to see a dog/cat when they already have one at home.

The only way this would work is if we purposely created some instabilities within the dinosaur DNA so that they'll explode after a period of time. That way, parents would be forced to continue purchasing pet dinosaurs thus providing us with a secondary stream of revenue. For the people who don't have enough money to invest in a pet dinosaur, our park will provide a suitable alternative.

[RaptorsRwk]

Update: I seem to have hit a bit of a snag in my work. Apparently it's not completely "legal" to take dino bones from museums and grind them up. (how was I supposed to know)

[Martin McFly]

Update: I seem to have hit a bit of a snag in my work. Apparently it's not completely "legal" to take dino bones from museums and grind them up. (how was I supposed to know)

I'm curious as to why you simply didn't pose as a refreshment boy during an excavation excursion and simply pocket the bones when no one was looking. You know, gain everyone's trust before running off with the precious bones that they devote their entire lives to studying.

[RaptorsRwk]

I'm curious as to why you simply didn't pose as a refreshment boy during an excavation excursion and simply pocket the bones when no one was looking. You know, gain everyone's trust before running off with the precious bones that they devote their entire lives to studying.

Well that worked at first but then the excavations started turning up dry so i turned to the museums. I posed as the museums new curator and it was working wonderfully until they found him tied up in the closet.

But not to worry a moustache here a beard there and im back in buisness.

[Martin McFly]

Well that worked at first but then the excavations started turning up dry so i turned to the museums. I posed as the museums new curator and it was working wonderfully until they found him tied up in the closet.

But not to worry a moustache here a beard there and im back in buisness.

I do hope you're wearing gloves during these outings. We can't afford having your fingerprints act as a direct link to us as an organization; the authorities would get suspicious fast.

[RaptorsRwk]

I do hope you're wearing gloves during these outings. We can't afford having your fingerprints act as a direct link to us as an organization; the authorities would get suspicious fast.

Not to worry i had my fingerprints erased long ago in preparation for this project and as for the authorities lets just say i have friends in high places.

[EvilDeadFan]

How high are they? Is it possible they can get me a mounted machine gun? For er... High end holding simulations and possible incidents? We need to be careful for the sake of our game wardens of course!

[Panther10]

have fun with that. Be sure to have your secretary send an email my way after you get eaten.

[Martin McFly]

have fun with that. Be sure to have your secretary send an email my way after you get eaten.

Better than that, we'll send you a free admission coupon.

[Panther10]

Well as long as its free it means I wont feel guilty if I decline the invitation.

[asyncus]

Have we descided on the location yet? The bulgarian scientists are at the moment very satisfied as most of them have received aged vintage cuban cigars. To quote Gregor, the supervisor of the team: "Is OK" which I think is a very good way of looking at the future for us.

[RaptorsRwk]

How high are they? Is it possible they can get me a mounted machine gun? For er... High end holding simulations and possible incidents? We need to be careful for the sake of our game wardens of course!

Already on their way. Thats part of our parks security.

[RaptorsRwk]

Better than that, we'll send you a free admission coupon.

I thought we already voted no on that whole free coupon day idea.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Already on their way. Thats part of our parks security.

Good to know, even though they're mostly going to be for show

[RaptorsRwk]

Good to know, even though they're mostly going to be for show

Or are they........?:eek:

[Tyrannosaur87]

Or are they........?:eek:

Only one way to find out. We should seek someone to train our rangers to be prepared for anything at any given moment, since our Warden will be busy with other projects. These animals are very unpredictable, so it's best we have some sort of knowledge to use to our advantage. I for one don't want 'Clever Girl' to be my last words...:D

[RaptorsRwk]

Only one way to find out. We should seek someone to train our rangers to be prepared for anything at any given moment, since our Warden will be busy with other projects. These animals are very unpredictable, so it's best we have some sort of knowledge to use to our advantage. I for one don't want 'Clever Girl' to be my last words...:D

I say we have a minimum 2 year course where they will be trained physically and mentally( as in learning the behavioral patterns of the animals and going through countless simulations) and at the end they will have to survive 2 days on the island with no help from us. Now that is being prepared.

[Martin McFly]

I thought we already voted no on that whole free coupon day idea.

We did. I'm just practicing my sarcasm for when I we become rich. Rich people use sarcasm a lot, you know.

[RaptorsRwk]

We did. I'm just practicing my sarcasm for when I we become rich. Rich people use sarcasm a lot, you know.

No i never did. But i do now

[Martin McFly]

No i never did. But i do now

And knowing is half the battle.

http://fancinematoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/GIJoeHeader.jpg

[RaptorsRwk]

Because knowledge is power!


http://fancinematoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/GIJoeHeader.jpg

[asyncus]

mr McFly, pwnage is never going to be a part of our corporation!! although 3 men, a red-headed woman and the Vitruvian man on the right is very intimitading! :)

[Tyrannosaur87]

I say we have a minimum 2 year course where they will be trained physically and mentally( as in learning the behavioral patterns of the animals and going through countless simulations) and at the end they will have to survive 2 days on the island with no help from us. Now that is being prepared.

Perfect. It'll seperate the stragglers from those of us who are meant for this type of work.

[anashastar]

Hey we at the hatchery would like to know when we will begin receiving the young ones :]

[RaptorsRwk]

Perfect. It'll seperate the stragglers from those of us who are meant for this type of work.

Now all we need is a pool of volunteers. I will be first to volunteer because as an employee at this park i want to be able to handle myself should something go wrong.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Now all we need is a pool of volunteers. I will be first to volunteer because as an employee at this park i want to be able to handle myself should something go wrong.

I volunteer also. I wouldn't do much good if I didn't have any training with the animals and in certain scenarios

[RaptorsRwk]

I volunteer also. I wouldn't do much good if I didn't have any training with the animals and in certain scenarios

Now we just need another 100 or so volunteers. That shouldnt be too hard.:D

[Tyrannosaur87]

Now we just need another 100 or so volunteers. That shouldnt be too hard.:D

Asking people to put their lives on the line and their careers and personal lives on hold for 2 years for the good of a park filled with dinosaurs? Should be a piece of cake. :D

[RaptorsRwk]

Asking people to put their lives on the line and their careers and personal lives on hold for 2 years for the good of a park filled with dinosaurs? Should be a piece of cake. :D

Yeah and if not then theres always the homeless and orphans.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Yeah and if not then theres always the homeless and orphans.

A little dark, but it works.

[Martin McFly]

mr McFly, pwnage is never going to be a part of our corporation!!

It won't? But what about all the charts and diagrams that I created? All the hard work I put into our future 'pwnage' ideas?

You can't do this to me!

http://i154.photobucket.com/albums/s246/oOKyraOo/miloreaction2.png

[RaptorsRwk]

A little dark, but it works.

Well the orphans would mainly be tasked with making the ranger equipment and cheap over priced toys. so we hit two birds with one stone or orphan.

[EvilDeadFan]

Already on their way. Thats part of our parks security.

Excellent, and how about the kegs of beer for high-end research?

[RaptorsRwk]

Excellent, and how about the kegs of beer for high-end research?

those go to my builders. Thats how we pay them keeps them focused.

[asyncus]

@McFly Two pwnage-ideas and a chocolate ice-cream? Ok?

[Martin McFly]

...What size is the ice cream?

[Tyrannosaur87]

Well the orphans would mainly be tasked with making the ranger equipment and cheap over priced toys. so we hit two birds with one stone or orphan.

That works. Orphans or not, you never know when one might get wise and try to file a lawsuit against us.

[RaptorsRwk]

That works. Orphans or not, you never know when one might get wise and try to file a lawsuit against us.

Thats why we would have a big glass enclosure to show the kids working . Then if the feds start snooping around we simply pass them off as another attraction like the "It's a small world" ride even though you know all those kids are real.:cool:

[Tyrannosaur87]

Thats why we would have a big glass enclosure to show the kids working . Then if the feds start snooping around we simply pass them off as another attraction like the "It's a small world" ride even though you know all those kids are real.:cool:

I would suggest putting a sign that says 'Dinosaur Feeding Pen' or something along those lines above the viewport just for comedic effect, but that'd probably lead to even more trouble

[RaptorsRwk]

I would suggest putting a sign that says 'Dinosaur Feeding Pen' or something along those lines above the viewport just for comedic effect, but that'd probably lead to even more trouble

Actually i was thinking of a sign that reads "your tax dollars at WORK" (big emphasis on work).

[Tyrannosaur87]

Actually i was thinking of a sign that reads "your tax dollars at WORK" (big emphasis on work).

Bold. I like it

[RaptorsRwk]

Bold. I like it

Bold and underlined so they know we mean buisness.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Bold and underlined so they know we mean buisness.

Definitely works

[asyncus]

...What size is the ice cream?

No its not dino-dropping. It's the size of your ice-cream.

[Martin McFly]

No its not dino-dropping. It's the size of your ice-cream.

I suppose that's acceptable. I'll contact your assistant/secretary/you regarding my 'pwnage' ideas and we'll have a meeting sometime next week. Thank you, sir.

[EvilDeadFan]

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have months to go, plenty of time to continue the development of our park, as Head of Holding Onto One's Game Warden, I designate the next few months up to the release of the game to be months of doubled work effort, let's get those guns, stores, hotels, and of course, dinos, into the trash heap we paid good money for and earn some dosh!

[RaptorsRwk]

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have months to go, plenty of time to continue the development of our park, as Head of Holding Onto One's Game Warden, I designate the next few months up to the release of the game to be months of doubled work effort, let's get those guns, stores, hotels, and of course, dinos, into the trash heap we paid good money for and earn some dosh!

I was about oto suggest the same thing

[asyncus]

I must admit, unfortunately, we have made some embarrassing /wrong calculations, both on the personnel side which is not completely solid. There are some things we need to look at, as the flavors we have in our ice cream products. Today we only have strawberry and some strange siberian Flower that tastes like underwear. The water tattoos on the kids doesn't work properly also. Small things, will probably be back in October, November. Will get back to you! //The Park

[Peacemaker613]

oooooooo i will like to apply for a job here at the park

[asyncus]

oooooooo i will like to apply for a job here at the park

What are your skills? Today we much prefer people that keep deadlines.

[RaptorsRwk]

oooooooo i will like to apply for a job here at the park

Do you have references?

[Romeosierra616]

Can I be security? I can hire a bunch of little Costa Rican guards, whom you will eventually find bits and pieces of laying around the Visitors Center!

Who doesn't want to step on an ear?

[RaptorsRwk]

Can I be security? I can hire a bunch of little Costa Rican guards, whom you will eventually find bits and pieces of laying around the Visitors Center!

Who doesn't want to step on an ear?

Well you can apply as one of those guards however we already have a warden

[Romeosierra616]

Well you can apply as one of those guards however we already have a warden


If I get to be one that lives, and speaks English then I'd like to apply!:D I have some military training, so I could guard those vending machines like nobody's business!

And in the VERY VERY VERY unlikely case a dinosaur/poorly executed espionage related incident occurs, I could shoot things!:cool:

[RaptorsRwk]

If I get to be one that lives, and speaks English then I'd like to apply!:D I have some military training, so I could guard those vending machines like nobody's business!

And in the VERY VERY VERY unlikely case a dinosaur/poorly executed espionage related incident occurs, I could shoot things!:cool:

Luckily for you safety is our number 1 concern and no expense is being spared welcome to the team

[Romeosierra616]

Luckily for you safety is our number 1 concern and no expense is being spared welcome to the team
Sweet!

[Tyrannosaur87]

Would security fall under the same category as Park Rangers?

[RaptorsRwk]

Would security fall under the same category as Park Rangers?

I don't see why not they are our only protection from the dino's in the unlikely event of a power outage in that they act as "squad leaders" for the ordinary guards.

[Tyrannosaur87]

I don't see why not they are our only protection from the dino's in the unlikely event of a power outage in that they act as "squad leaders" for the ordinary guards.

Makes sense to me

[RaptorsRwk]

Makes sense to me

yes but we still need a lovable and teddy bear like old man with a cane.

[Tyrannosaur87]

Well, since Sir Attenborough is in very poor health at this time and isn't likely to be with us for much longer, that spot's gonna be hard to fill.

[RaptorsRwk]

Well, since Sir Attenborough is in very poor health at this time and isn't likely to be with us for much longer, that spot's gonna be hard to fill.

We must bring him back by cloning him and mixing his DNA with that of a frog!

[tredlow]

I'm gonna create my own park! With blackjack, and-

I'm gonna create my own park! With blackjack and hookers! In fact, forget the park!

Oh, the joke's been done.