Insult Sword Fighting! (Create your own insults!)

[hplikelike]

(Continuing the insults)

You are so weak that I could beat you with a piece of paper.

[fred1712]

(Continuing the insults)

You are so weak that I could beat you with a piece of paper. Not before I beat YOU with a Feather!!


____________________________



I've seen better fightin' from my Great Grandmother!!!

[Silverwolfpet]

She must've taught you everything you know.

------------------------

Every enemy I've met I've decapitated!

[Gryffalio]

Right about what? Sorry I don't know much about the JW's as they're not allowed to come to my house on account of believing my mother is a witch.

I have heard that they believe that only 140,000 people will go to heaven (or some figure like that).

JWs stereotypically believe the end of the world is just around the corner. When I smell his breath, it's so bad I wish the world would just end! :)

She must've taught you everything you know.

------------------------

Every enemy I've met I've decapitated!

That's because you're so slow you wouldn't notice a tortoise which has been heavily sedated.

====

You're the weakest whelp ever created!

[tredlow]

You're the weakest whelp ever created!

Oh no! Does that mean we're related?

-------

The Reaper wretch in disgust when he takes your soul!

[fred1712]

Oh no! Does that mean we're related?

-------

The Reaper wretch in disgust when he takes your soul! He Was so disgusted about your soul, you were the last man in the world!


----------------


Your A Disgrace to Apekind!!!

[hplikelike]

He Was so disgusted about your soul, you were the last man in the world!


----------------


Your A Disgrace to Apekind!!!

Yer a Disgrace to Slugkind!!!

_____________________________________

I've seen jellyfish wit' more brains then ye.

[Marduk]

Yer a Disgrace to Slugkind!!!

_____________________________________

I've seen jellyfish wit' more brains then ye.
But at least I have a spine ;-)

-----------

You're the least creative bohemian I've ever met.

[Gryffalio]

But at least I have a spine ;-)

-----------

You're the least creative bohemian I've ever met.

At least my piracy means I can afford new clothes, unlike you by the smell of it!

---

If your cricket were as bad as your swordsplay, you would be out for a golden duck!

[tredlow]

If your cricket were as bad as your swordsplay, you would be out for a golden duck!


At least I can tell the difference between swordplay and cricket.

-----------

Your face looks like it's been digested by a narwhal!

[Soup]

A narwhal wouldn't touch yours in a free all-you-can-eat buffet!

----------------

Stealing your womenfolk would be easy, if you had any!

[Juicius Maximus]

Stealing your womenfolk would be easy, if you had any!

Womenfolk? Nay. Wenches? Aye. And my wenches would steal YOU if they thought anyone would actually pay the ransom.

------------------

The Carribbean Seas be my personal playground, and ye and yer ship but toys in my hands!


EDIT: IMHestofOs, Insult Swordfighting works best when the true "insult" lies in the reply, or "comeback." Ideally, the opening dis is self-aggrandizing in nauture, thus ripe for ridicule. Think of yourself and the responder as a comedy duo and try to set them up for the juiciest punchline! See above, think I left myself wide open here!

[tredlow]

Stealing your womenfolk would be easy, if you had any!

How? Are you going to open a shoe outlet?

The Carribbean Sea is my personal playground, and ye and yer ship are but toys in my hands!

Your sword is as dangerous as a toy in your hands as well.

--------

The sound of my voice makes womens' heart beat and mens' heart stop!

[Juicius Maximus]

The sound of my voice makes womens' heart beat and mens' heart stop!

Oh, so you got the job after all as spokespirate for Captain Blondebeard's new "Artery Clogger Deluxe" chicken sandwich, double-deep-fried in a heapin' glob o' lard?

----------------

I'll skin ye alive, stretch yer hide into a canvas, and have the finest artiste in the tri-island area paint my portrait on it!

[tredlow]

I'll skin ye alive, stretch yer hide into a canvas, and have the finest artiste in the tri-island area paint my portrait on it!

Save your trouble, my hide is ALREADY a portrait of you!

-----------

I feel sorry for your mother to have ever given you birth!

[Juicius Maximus]

Save your trouble, my hide is ALREADY a portrait of you!

I know it's never funny when you have to explain it, but I don't get this one.

[tredlow]

I know it's never funny when you have to explain it, but I don't get this one.

Okay, my reply sucks. Let me think of another...

I'll skin ye alive, stretch yer hide into a canvas, and have the finest artiste in the tri-island area paint my portrait on it!

If you use my arse instead, you wouldn't need a painter!

There.

Anyway;

I feel sorry for your mother to have ever given birth to you!

[Marduk]

If you use my arse instead, you wouldn't need a painter! And I don't particularly get this one :P In any case, I know (or I think I know, correct me if I'm wrong) an animal's hide is normally just it's skin but when people talk about the hide's of other people aren't they talking about their arses anyway? Because saying "I'll tan your hide" wouldn't have as much of a kick to it if wasn't about bottoms.

And... saying that using your arse instead of a canvas wouldn't require a painter... Do you have a nice tattoo there? Or maybe some kind of rash that seems to look like a person's face?

[tredlow]

And... saying that using your arse instead of a canvas wouldn't require a painter... Do you have a nice tattoo there? Or maybe some kind of rash that seems to look like a person's face?

No, I'm saying that your face looks like my arse, so you wouldn't require a painter to paint a portrait of you on it since it already represents your face.

[Juicius Maximus]

No, I'm saying that your face looks like my arse, so you wouldn't require a painter to paint a portrait of you on it since it already represents your face.

I got it, and it was definitely wittier than the first one. But this confused back and forth is even better. I guess trying to explain jokes CAN be funny!

[Instagib]

I feel sorry for your mother to have ever given birth to you!

How appropriate. Me and your mother feel sorry for giving YOU birth.

------------

After I´m done with you, you will wish you´d be dead!

[tredlow]

After I´m done with you, you will wish you´d be dead!

At least I'll still be alive when this battle is over!

or

True, anything is better than encountering the likes of you!

or

So that's why your girlfriend attempted suicide!

------------

The term 'the pen is mightier than the sword' is literally correct, when you are holding the sword.

[Marduk]

The term 'the pen is mightier than the sword' is literally correct, when you are holding the sword.

Aye, but at least me grammer be correc' in me writin's and I be usin' me commas in pro'er fashion!
------

What did yer last opponent die o'? Boredom?

[hplikelike]

Aye, but at least me grammer be correc' in me writin's and I be usin' me commas in pro'er fashion!
------

What did yer last opponent die o'? Boredom?

Only after telling my stories about you.


__________________________________

Your so pale, you make snow look tan in comparison. (CoMI reference)

[Tea]

Nah, I'm so pale because I'm shocked at yer face!

---

YER the reason this thread ain't stickied!

[Marduk]

well, if we stick to MI rules there's 1 come back to every insult but each come back can be used on multiple insults (ie, responses learned in 'practise' fights can be used in 'boss' fights). I haven't made this a rule and I'm not convinced I should, though I'm still considering it.

If it was to be a rule then this (http://www.telltalegames.com/forums/showpost.php?p=137284&postcount=127) would be the correct come back but only if it won the round. I shall leave this for debate.

[Marduk]

YER the reason this thread ain't stickied!(I decided to do this SMI style and stick with an response already given, though I was hoping somebody might have come up with something better). (I have nothing). It won't have to be, it's going to be wiki'd!

--------

You've never had an intelligent thought in your life!

[Weeblerjake]

Your brain is so dull you can't think at all!
_________

You wish you were as powerful as me!

[guitarsareboring]

People dropped to their knees when I arrived in town

-----------------------------

So you're still not using that deodorant I bought you for Christmas?

[Silverwolfpet]

So you're still not using that deodorant I bought you for Christmas?

No, I really don't like "Eau de LeGuitarsAreBoring". :p (just kidding...)

-------------------

Your face remarkably resembles the back-side of a ship!

[Xocrates]

Your face remarkably resembles the back-side of a ship!
Yours just resembles a back-side.

---

When I'm done with you, not even your mother will be able to identify your corpse.

[Mad Mary]

When I'm done with you, not even your mother will be able to identify your corpse.

When I'm done with you, there will be nothing left of you for even trying.

You won't even hit a barn with your fumbling.

[Azure]

When I'm done with you, there will be nothing left of you for even trying.

You won't even hit a barn with your fumbling.

You wouldn't even frighten a cow with all your mumbling.

You're as welcome as a fart on a warm summers day.

[Mad Mary]

You wouldn't even frighten a cow with all your mumbling.
You're as welcome as a fart on a warm summers day.

And you, for a start, like the smell of decay!

Is your brain as tiny as that knife you call 'sword'?

[Fullmetal Child]

And you, for a start, like the smell of decay!

Is your brain as tiny as that knife you call 'sword'?

It's bigger than the one in that wife of yours.

Was your father a gorilla, or did you just have an incurable bad hair day?

[Edward VanHelgen]

You're as welcome as a fart on a warm summers day.

Even fart would be enough to blow you away!

Is your brain as tiny as that knife you call 'sword'?

And that wooden stick was all YOU could afford?

ok one more

Was your father a gorilla, or did you just have an incurable bad hair day?

Umm.. you will.. uh, pay? For such a lousy insulting i mean, i will make you pay and all that.. u got it, right? Oh, come on, it wasnt that bad?

I can jump the coconut tree with no strain at all!

[Juicius Maximus]

I can jump the coconut tree with no strain at all!

Aye, but you jumped the shark when you decided to take ME on!

-----------------

Arr, I be noddin' off here! Tell one o' these witnesses to wake me when I've killed ye.

[Mad Mary]

Your face remarkably resembles the back-side of a ship!
Rather a STERN face than yours, you squib!

Arr, I be noddin' off here! Tell one o' these witnesses to wake me when I've killed ye.
Noddin' off, eh? So no wonder yer fighting style is a nightmare.

I've slain more people than I can even count.

[Edward VanHelgen]

I've slain more people than I can even count.

Since you can't count at all, it's not such a big amount!

I catch cannonballs with my bare hand!

[Toothless Gibbon]

I've slain more people than I can even count.

But you can’t count to ten; so a measly amount!

-----------------------------------------------------


My blade is so sharp it can slice solid rock.

[Fulvio75]

Since you can't count at all, it's not such a big amount!

I catch cannonballs with my bare hand!

Just to make the others think you're a man!

Please let me show your new home: fresh, quiet and underground!

[Juicius Maximus]

My blade is so sharp it can slice solid rock.

But NOTHING could penetrate that thick skull of yours!

Please let me show your new home: fresh, quiet and underground!

I've been WONDERING who took over for Stan at the Used Coffin Emporium!

------------------

In my hold lies a crate of "I defeated Jucius Maximus and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" t-shirts. Mint in box, never been worn...and never will be!

[Mad Mary]

My blade is so sharp it can slice solid rock.
That you cannot use it must have been a shock.

In my hold lies a crate of "I defeated Jucius Maximus and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" t-shirts. Mint in box, never been worn...and never will be!
That's because no one wants anything from you!

I am quite sure you don't know what you're doing.

[Juicius Maximus]

My blade is so sharp it can slice solid rock.

But NOTHING could penetrate that thick skull of yours!

That you cannot use it must have been a shock.

= Mad Mary win. Looking back, I realized we were on a rhyming run and I totally disregarded it.

EDIT: Oh, and...

I am quite sure you don't know what you're doing.

It might serve you to recall that you're fleeing and I'm persuing.

[Edward VanHelgen]

I am quite sure you don't know what you're doing.

Oh sure you do - i m giving you some cutlass hewing.

[Mad Mary]

I'm shivering, I'm shivering... ;)
Both answers are great, guys, but where's the next insult??? :confused:

[Edward VanHelgen]

oh well i guessed to let jucius post a new insult since he was faster, but now that i m here

You cant tell the cheese from gol', and ye'r think to plunder ship and all?

[Mad Mary]

You cant tell the cheese from gol', and ye'r think to plunder ship an all?

I AM thinking, yes and you'll fall, 'cause yer lack of brain use'll take its toll.

(That was not easy...)

You can't imagine how good I am fighting.

[PariahKing]

If it t'were true you would stop moonlighting!

All of my foes end up impaled on a doorhinge.

[Fullmetal Child]

If it t'were true you would stop moonlighting!

All of my foes end up impaled on a doorhinge.

What a coincidence. All my foes end up balled like an orange.

I've seen grannies put up more of a fight.

[Marduk]

I've seen grannies put up more of a fight.

You mean you were beaten up by one?

-----

I have more fighting skill in my smallest fart than you have in your entire body!

[Mad Mary]

You mean you were beaten up by one?
I have more fighting skill in my smallest fart than you have in your entire body!

That's true, your smell is almost impossible to endure.
(Couldn't find a rhyme for that one.)

_ _ _ _ _

People adore my sword art where ever I might sail!

[Juicius Maximus]

I've seen grannies put up more of a fight.

But I've never seen a fanny that was more of a blight!

-----------------

I'll kill a man if I don't like the way he blinks

[Juicius Maximus]

Whoops! Too slow!

People adore my sword art where ever I might sail!

Then surely they'll abbhor me when I smite ye without fail!

-------------

The merest mention of my name makes women weep and babies bawl!

[Mad Mary]

The merest mention of my name makes women weep and babies bawl!
They pity you, kid, what a shame; I'll make you creep now 'fore me and crawl!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

All over the sea I'm feared and respected.

[Junaid]

All over the sea I'm feared and respected.

Too bad at home you're completely neglected

-------------------------------------------------

Me and my sword will one day rule the world!

[Mad Mary]

Me and my sword will one day rule the world!
Nice dream, but now for me your hair'll be curled!
-------------------------------------------------------
You fight like a monkey who's drunk too much grog.

[Edward VanHelgen]

Me and my sword will one day rule the world!

Rule the world? More likely chances has a chimp with a turd!

You fight like a monkey who's drunk too much grog.

But I don't fight and jump like a rootbeer drinking frog!

When I step the shores natives run in disarray!

[Mad Mary]

When I step the shores natives run in disarray!
In fear of your boasting they rather don't stay.
----------------------------------------------
You fight like a squirrel, you talk like a donkey.

[Edward VanHelgen]

In fear of your boasting they rather don't stay.



haha a great one :D

[Dilorenzo]

You fight like a squirrel, you talk like a donkey.

At least when I fight, I don't look like an ass

-----------------------------------

The only thing that could make me cry worse than your fighting style is an onion.

[Juicius Maximus]

The only thing that could make me cry worse than your fighting style is an onion

And that's the way you'll die, by citing style before substance

------------------------------

By the time I'm finished with ye, even Deadeye Dave's most cutting edge experimental prostheses couldn't piece ye back together!

[Mad Mary]

haha a great one :D
Thanx!

By the time I'm finished with ye, even Deadeye Dave's most cutting edge experimental prostheses couldn't piece ye back together!
Right you are, for I will laugh until I explode if I have to watch you any longer.
--------------------------------------------------
No one ever challenged me and lived.

[Marduk]

.
But I've never seen a fanny that was more of a blight!
Dude, that's disgusting.

[thatdude98]

Arrr, by the time I'm done with all of you, even the monkeys won't come near!

[Mad Mary]

(Guys, you are supposed to answer to an insult first and then write a new one...)

Arrr, by the time I'm done with all of you, even the monkeys won't come near!
That's because even in your family no one wants to be with you.
---------------------------------------------------------------
I'd rather go to Hell than stay in your company!

[Marduk]

I wasn't answering, I really meant the comment I was replying to was disgusting. Rule number 10. (http://www.telltalegames.com/forums/showpost.php?p=136377&postcount=1)

I'm sure talk of female genitalia (and male, for that matter) counts. Unless it's a cleverly disguised innuendo, I guess.

[PariahKing]

I think in America a "fanny" is actually your butt.

[Leak]

I think in America a "fanny" is actually your butt.
Fanny: (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fanny)
[...]
* A British slang term for a vagina.
* An American slang term for the buttocks.
[...]
Pretty much looks like Brits and Americans are separated by a common language... discuss.

np: Tayo - Choppa Riddim (Soul Jazz Records Singles 2008-2009 (Disc 2))

[thatdude98]

(Guys, you are supposed to answer to an insult first and then write a new one...)


That's because even in your family no one wants to be with you.
---------------------------------------------------------------
I'd rather go to Hell than stay in your company!

Give my regards to LeChuck for me!
------------------------------------
How does someone so grog filled and dim even type an insult?

[viz]

Pretty much looks like Brits and Americans are separated by a common language... discuss.

What language is that then? ;)

How does someone so grog filled and dim even type an insult?

The same way someone so duck billed and grim can hype an assault!

---

You need more of your goons to even out the battle!

[meander]

I don't need extra help to annihilate cattle!

-----

When people see my ship dock, they cower in fear!

[Juicius Maximus]

When people see my ship dock, they cower in fear!

Only when you hit the rocks man, learn how to steer!

---------------

I'm tempted to hew off my own leg just to make this fight fair!

[Mad Mary]

I'm tempted to hew off my own leg just to make this fight fair!
You've never learned to walk anyway, so why should I care?
--------------------------------------------------------
I'll make you beg for your life, that much I swear!

[Silverwolfpet]

First I'm gonna beg for you to find something decent to WEAR!

----------------------

Should I use a newspaper or dog-biscuits to educate you?

[Mad Mary]

Should I use a newspaper or dog-biscuits to educate you?
As if you could tell the difference, you jailbait, boo!
---------------------------------------------------
I'd beat you even handcuffed and hobbled.

[Edward VanHelgen]

I'd beat you even handcuffed and hobbled.

Well, i am amazed that it turns you on. (*covers in shame)

I dont need a ship - I ride at backs of whale, fly by a bird's trail! (tail?)

[Silverwolfpet]

I dont need a ship - I ride at backs of whale, fly by a bird's trail! (tail?)

Gosh, what do they serve you poor inmates in jail?!

------------------------

I am standing in awe of your stupidity.

[Mad Mary]

Well, i am amazed that it turns you on. (*covers in shame)
I dont need a ship - I ride at backs of whale, fly by a bird's trail! (tail?)
That proves you're a snip - your tries to steer did fail, die by my sword, shirttail!

I am standing in awe of your stupidity.
I thought you'd more comfortable in lack of lucidity.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Give up, bastard, run, and I spare your life.

[onlyamonkey]

Give up, bastard, run, and I spare your life.

I'm already dead sir, I've seen your wife!

---

You can't even rhyme, you mongrel!

[Juicius Maximus]

I am standing in awe of your stupidity.

Shut that gaping maw! It's left a stench in the vicinity!

-------------------------

Please, no more of your wordplay! Your swordplay is more than enough insult for one day.

EDIT: Soooo slow. That'll learn me to multitask

[onlyamonkey]

Someone is bad at multitasking. Now give me an insult.

[Juicius Maximus]

You can't even rhyme, you mongrel!

Pirating, not poetry, eats up most of my time...and you'll be writing your next song in hell!

(Oy. An insult about rhyming that ends on "mongrel?" You so did that on purpose!)
----------------------

*Refer to my last post for opening insult

[Mad Mary]

Please, no more of your wordplay! Your swordplay is more than enough insult for one day.

Like your senseless babbling is more than enough for an entire life.
------------------------------------------------------
I'll show you what 'pain' means, I'll teach you some manners!

[Marduk]

That proves you're a snip - your tries to steer did fail, die by my sword, shirttail!


I thought you'd more comfortable in lack of lucidity.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Give up, bastard, run, and I spare your life.
Rule 9.Like your senseless babbling is more than enough for an entire life.
------------------------------------------------------
I'll show you what 'pain' means, I'll teach you some manners! Prove to me that you can spell and I'll hang streamers and banners.

--------------

Call yourself a pirate? You couldn't scare a toddler!

[Mad Mary]

Rule 9.
Oops... sorry.

Call yourself a pirate? You couldn't scare a toddler!
Call yourself a human? You look a bit odd, er...
----------------------------------------------
I've never heard insults worse than yours.

[Marduk]

Oops... sorry.


Call yourself a human? You look a bit odd, er...
----------------------------------------------
I've never heard insults worse than yours.

You look like that beast they say lurks in the moors...

----

Come back and fight me when you've learned to open doors.

[Mad Mary]

Come back and fight me when you learn to open doors.
I'll fight you, you'll see, when you're done with wiping floors.
---------------------------------------------------------
Ye're sure you don't want to go home to your Mommy?

[Edward VanHelgen]

some more versions :p

Come back and fight me when you've learned to open doors.

Aye but could you please, learn to walk for once and all? or

Come back and fight me when you've learned to open doors.

Like you open bottles and roam the tavern floors? its kinda stoled from actual ones :o :D

Ye're sure you don't want to go home to your Mommy?

I've just been at ye're wife's, you dummy!

I can juggle coconuts, even cannon balls!

[Strongsadioware]

I can juggle coconuts, even cannon balls!

Good, next time you juggle, I hope they all fall!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

You're so bad at this, Death fainted!

[Mad Mary]

You're so bad at this, Death fainted!
He just saw a picture of you I painted.
--------------------------------------------
Your insults are really as dull as your blade.

[Edward VanHelgen]

I can juggle coconuts, even cannon balls!

Good, next time you juggle, I hope they all fall!

Uhh, sorry to neat-picking on your own response, which i liked but wouldn't be better if you said

I can juggle coconuts, even cannon balls!

Good, next time you juggle, try them NOT TO fall

So, this way you would actually suggest they i suck as a juggler and all that, because if you say "i hope they all fall" you are actually agreeing with me and my juggling skills :D

[thatdude98]

He just saw a picture of you I painted.
--------------------------------------------
Your insults are really as dull as your blade.

At least I'm not the one fighting with a rusted garden spade!
-----------------
In all the seven seas, no one can match my wit!

[Mad Mary]

In all the seven seas, no one can match my wit!
Too bad that your body always gets hit!
----------------------------------------
There's no man, nor woman who never heard my name.

[Edward VanHelgen]

There's no man, nor woman who never heard my name.

So, the circus posters advertise is bringing you some fame.

[Mad Mary]

Er... next insult?

[Edward VanHelgen]

Er... next insult?

Why bother? You'll lose as a result! :p Ok, ok, just kidding, here

I've seen elephants with better footwork then you.

[Crakker]

And yet I have beaten all of your crew!

-----

The size of your belly, yet you fit on this ship?

(My last inslut was cheating in the rhyme scheme)

[thatdude98]

And yet I have beaten all of your crew!

-----

The size of your belly, yet you fit on this ship?

(My last inslut was cheating in the rhyme scheme)

Of course! The mass of my size prevents me from slips!
------------
Your swordsmanship is so bad, ALL pirates berate it!

[Strongsadioware]

But when they saw you, you became hated!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Give up already! You're as better as a drunken pig!

[Marduk]

But when they saw you, you became hated!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Give up already! You're as better as a drunken pig! *sigh* yours is yet another grave to dig...

----

You handle your sword like a rotten old twig!

[Strongsadioware]

And YOU handle yours like a lighted firework rigged!
-------------------------------------------------------
This is boring. Once I win, I'll drink to your health!

[meander]

-----------------------------------
This is boring. Once I win, I'll drink to your health!

It will be tricky to drink with my sword through your mouth.

-----

My last rival lies in Davy Jones' locker!

[thatdude98]

It will be tricky to drink with my sword through your mouth.

-----

My last rival lies in Davy Jones' locker!

Oh yeah, suuure. Bring the Monkees into this, ya gawker!
-----------
You're not stupid; your possessed by a retarded ghost!

[Iron Curtain]

You're not stupid; your [sic] possessed by a retarded ghost!

Methinks its problems are the fault of the host!
--------
I've destroyed every pirate I've come across!

[Strongsadioware]

But when it comes to Dental Problems, you've never used floss.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I can kill pirates, tens and thousands more!

[LASD]

Too bad they're only figurines you bought from the store!
--------------
You're no match for me, just walk out the door!

[thatdude98]

Too bad they're only figurines you bought from the store!

You're no match for me, just walk out the door!

Nah, I'd rather beat you to the floor.
-------------------------
I'm going to take out the trash!

[LASD]

I'm going to take out the trash!
Good, while you work your back will feel my lash!
------------
I will cut you in two with a single slash!

[Crakker]

Ill still beat you faster than a thunderflash.

-----

I could go on fighting for over a month!

[Juicius Maximus]

I could go on fighting for over a month!

But I heard you went into hiding for over a year, once!

-----------------------------

You fight like a flooring inspector.

[Edward VanHelgen]

You fight like a flooring inspector.

And you look like a cow.

You are boring like Star Wars console games.

[Juicius Maximus]

Aww, come on Snugglecakes! Make it rhyme!

[Mad Mary]

Aww, come on Snugglecakes! Make it rhyme!I'm not Edward, but I'll try anyway.
You fight like a flooring inspector.
You're funny like a funeral director!

You are boring like Star Wars console games.
For your snoring there are no appropriate names.
-----------------------------------------------------
I am the best as just must admit!

[Edward VanHelgen]

Aww, come on Snugglecakes! Make it rhyme!

I would, but to waste it on you - thats not worth a dime. :p

[Ankalagon]

I'm not Edward, but I'll try anyway.

You're funny like a funeral director!


For your snoring there are no appropriate names.
-----------------------------------------------------
I am the best as just must admit!

To me, you look just like a piece of meat.

[Marduk]

To me, you look just like a piece of meat. And you have the brains (and stains) of a mens' room toilet seat. (Because... you know... you broke rule no. 1 (http://www.telltalegames.com/forums/showthread.php?t=9080)).

-------

Judging by your manners I'd say you were raised on the street.

[Ankalagon]

And you have the brains (and stains) of a mens' room toilet seat. (Because... you know... you broke rule no. 1 (http://www.telltalegames.com/forums/showthread.php?t=9080)).

-------

Judging by your manners I'd say you were raised on the street.

Yes sorry :S I forgot about it.

It's better that way 'cause I escaped from you and your high society disease. :)

Your brains match your smell and believe me that's not a pleasant one.

[Boots]

Your brains match your smell and believe me that's not a pleasant one.

well, at least i know how to wipe my own bum!

---------------------------------------------------

your face reminds me of a freshly dropped pie!

[hplikelike]

Yes sorry :S I forgot about it.

It's better that way 'cause I escaped from you and your high society disease. :)

Your brains match your smell and believe me that's not a pleasant one.

Mine's overpowering; yours just disgusting!

_____________________________________

Only someone as low as you would pirate Tales of Monkey Islandtm

[Crakker]

Only one as stuck up as you would look down on pirates
(Hey, ive boght the game though)

-------

All enemies i fight get overcome by angst!

[Ankalagon]

Only one as stuck up as you would look down on pirates
(Hey, ive boght the game though)

-------

All enemies i fight get overcome by angst!

What enemies? You mean the ones in your dreams?

----------------------

I can't even imagine you using a sword.

[xzodia]

I can't even imagine you using a sword.
No need, I'll just throw you over board!

---

When your sleeping with the fish's, send them my regards.

[Mad Mary]

When your sleeping with the fish's, send them my regards.
I will, after I have torn you apart.
---------------------------------
The mere presence of you makes me cringe.

[oleshikaru]

I will, after I have torn you apart.
---------------------------------
The mere presence of you makes me cringe.

Only because you rust your hinge ( yeah im no good at this )

----------------------------

I am rubber, you are glue :P

[xzodia]

I am rubber, you are glue :P
Thats not an insult...

---

Where were you when I needed a mop?

[Ganon Sheik]

Where were you when I needed a mop?




So you got that Housemaid job after all eh? Masters calling, better move along, chop chop.

----

Ive seen nose hairs with more integrity than you.

[xzodia]

Ive seen nose hairs with more integrity than you.
It must be terrible always Looking Up to people.

--

I didn't know they made swords short enough for you.

[Marduk]

It must be terrible always Looking Up to people.

--

I didn't know they made swords short enough for you. It's not the size that matters, it's the "stabbing you to death" with them that counts.

----


You're so vain you'll end up dying in your own arms.

[xzodia]

At least I'll still have mine while I live!

--

If only your wit was as sharp as your blade!

[Rubberduck]

At least I'll still have mine while I live!

--

If only your wit was as sharp as your blade!


Too bad it's gonna open you up so I can see how you're made.

or

Atleast I'm smart enough to keep it from getting dull.

--

A candle would put up a better fight than you.

[xzodia]

I've never met anyone so Wiki!

--

Did your mum dress you this morning?

[Crakker]

No, but yours did!

-----

You have too many flaws to count.

[xzodia]

You have too many flaws to count.
You never learned the number zero?

---

I can outwit you in my sleep!

[Mad Mary]

I can outwit you in my sleep!
While I hit you till you weep!
----------------------------------------
I have killed thousands of people like you.

[octochan]

Good thing for them that I'm one of a kind.

I almost feel sorry that you have to live with yourself.

[xzodia]

Anythings better than living with you!

--

Give up, before your in tears!

[Rubberduck]

Anythings better than living with you!

--

Give up, before your in tears!

Oh my, is that an onion peeler? I thought this was a swordfight.

----

My sword skills are mightier than the swordmaster herself.

[thatdude98]

Oh my, is that an onion peeler? I thought this was a swordfight.

----

My sword skills are mightier than the swordmaster herself.


HA! Carla will hang you for saying that, foolish whelp!
--------
I see you cower in fear before my might!

[Crakker]

From the size of your stomach, im afraid you might bite

-----

No-one can beat me, no-one alive!

[Marduk]

No-one can beat me, no-one alive!
Nobody would bother, you fight like you're 5.

----

You're so old you still listen to jive!

[Traz]

Your erection is as late as Monkey Island Screaming Narwhal's release.

[thatdude98]

Nobody would bother, you fight like you're 5.

----

You're so old you still listen to jive!

At least I'm so young, I'm still alive.
-----------------
When this first episode comes, I will be unstoppable!

[xzodia]

When this first episode comes, I will be unstoppable!
You need new insults, that badly?

--

If I have to wait much longer, you'll see my nasty side!

[Kyo555]

For you that monkey over there'd make a lovely bride!

--

Make haste, I have an appointment to attend later this day.

[Rubberduck]

For you that monkey over there'd make a lovely bride!

--

Make haste, I have an appointment to attend later this day.

Don't worry, I'll get you to yer grave with no delay.

---

You look like you were born from a hive.

[Juicius Maximus]

You look like you were born from a hive.

How appropriate, you fight like a beekeeper.

--------------------

I've been drinkin' grog all night, but ye and yer blurry twin brother are no match for me!

[xzodia]

I've been drinkin' grog all night, but ye and yer blurry twin brother are no match for me!

Look behind you a Six-Headed monkey!

---

Quit now or be late for your download!

[Edward VanHelgen]

I've been drinkin' grog all night, but ye and yer blurry twin brother are no match for me!

Only two? Are you sure? Drink some more, you'll see us three!

I'll crash you like the message board!

[Kyo555]

Look behind you a Six-Headed monkey!

---

Quit now or be late for your download!

If you talk smart, I'll push you offshore in a bumper car boat.

-----

I can't stop looking for the dowload-button to finally appear.

[xzodia]

I can't stop looking for the dowload-button to finally appear.
Can't be long now, do not fear!

---

Time is short, just like you!

[thatdude98]

Can't be long now, do not fear!

---

Time is short, just like you!

At least I don't smell like monkey poo.
---------
You're going to walk the plank!

[IronJawbone]

I have to. It's the only chance to get away from your Voodoo stank!
------------------------ (Going the Ozzie Mandrill route on this insult.) -------------------
You fight like a dizzy boomerang thrown by an abnormal platypus.

[Reubs1]

------------------------ (Going the Ozzie Mandrill route on this insult.) -------------------
You fight like a dizzy boomerang thrown by an abnormal platypus.

How appropriate! You fight like a toothless wallaby playing an out-of-tune didgeridoo!

---

Your sword looks like a hand-me-down toy!

[Mad Mary]

Your sword looks like a hand-me-down toy!
How appropriate. You look like a plaything.
or:
Yes, playin' 'hit you' will bring so much joy!
--------------------------------------------
You're as slow as an overloaded server.

[Edward VanHelgen]

You're as slow as an overloaded server.

And you fight like holding a dusting feather.

Since no one responded to my previous insult:

I'll crush you like the message board.

[IronJawbone]

(Reubs1 unlocks the "Comeback on the barbie" achievement.)


I'll crush you like the message board.

No, zero replies to your posts just means you're being ignored
------------------------
You're so pathetic, I'm more threatened by a manatee.

[Allysdelta]

You're so pathetic, I'm more threatened by a manatee.

Considering YOUR experience, I'm not surprised that your view of "threatening" is a bit skewed.
OR
How appropriate. You fight like a sea cow.

Give up, or the phrase "slashed to ribbons" is gonna become a lot more literal!

[tredlow]

Give up, or the phrase "slashed to ribbons" is gonna become a lot more literal!

Yeah, you will be slashed to ribbons, by me!

No, that sucks. Lemme try again.

Ah, so you've taken the gift-wrapping job as a career?

---------------

I won this sword in an arm-wrestling contest against Poseidon!

[Edward VanHelgen]

I won this sword in an arm-wrestling contest against Poseidon!

So you still work in theatre? Oh, that must've been a good show.

Stop playing Episode one, and come to fight me if you dare!

[thatdude98]

Stop playing Episode one, and come to fight me if you dare!

Nah... I'm too busy giving the monkey a flare. ZZZZZAP!

[Capotasto]

Stop playing Episode one, and come to fight me if you dare!

I would if you were half as challenging.
--------------------------------------
You call yourself a pirate? My Pyrite Parrot could out-drink you!

[Mad Mary]

You call yourself a pirate? My Pyrite Parrot could out-drink you!
Too bad it's less than a thimble full of grog before you spew.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
I even prefer bugs to your presence.

[thatdude98]

Too bad it's less than a thimble full of grog before you spew.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
I even prefer bugs to your presence.

Great! They really match your essence.
---------------
Morgan Le Flay will enjoy killing you!

[Capotasto]

Great! They really match your essence.
---------------
Morgan Le Flay will enjoy killing you!

You must be ashamed you have to call in help
-------------------------------------------
Your beard is as menacing as a toupee

[Mad Mary]

Your beard is as menacing as a toupee
I've heard you're as bold as a dish of puree.
-------------------------------------------
You call that fighting? It makes me just laugh.

[Marduk]

I've heard you're as bold as a dish of puree.
-------------------------------------------
You call that fighting? It makes me just laugh.

What is that smell? I think you need a bath.

--------

Give up now before I cut you in half!

[thatdude98]

What is that smell? I think you need a bath.

--------

Give up now before I cut you in half!

With what? Oh, are you talking about that horrible staff?
------------
I heard that not even the cavemen were as stupid as you!

[Capotasto]

With what? Oh, are you talking about that horrible staff?
------------
I heard that not even the cavemen were as stupid as you!

I come of alright when compared against you
------------------------------------------
I know the address of a good doctor, I can give you it after I draw blood from you.

[IronJawbone]

(That's a good insult, Capo.)
Thanks, in return, I'll haul your carcass to a good mortician after I've run you through.
----------------------------------------------------
You can't keep up with me! Onlookers would say you're fighting in slow motion!

[Marduk]

(That's a good insult, Capo.)
Thanks, in return, I'll haul your carcass to a good mortician after I've run you through.
----------------------------------------------------
You can't keep up with me! Onlookers would say you're fighting in slow motion!It's 'cause you're too slick and greasy with too much sun tan lotion.

-------

Our fight would be such a spectical I'd suggest you brought a friend... But you don't have one :(

[lisky8]

I'm shaking, I'm shaking!

[thatdude98]

(That's a good insult, Capo.)
Thanks, in return, I'll haul your carcass to a good mortician after I've run you through.
----------------------------------------------------
You can't keep up with me! Onlookers would say you're fighting in slow motion!

Not if I feed you this sick voodoo potion.
--------------
My goodness :eek:, can't they train a fighter that's not so butt ugly?

[Mad Mary]

My goodness :eek:, can't they train a fighter that's not so butt ugly?
Your family must be rich to have a team of sword masters for themselves!
-------------------------------------------------------------
Is your brain as tiny as your knife?

[tredlow]

Is your brain as tiny as your knife?

No, but I know that over-sized sword of yours is contemplating for something.

----------

You look like you crawled out of the uncanny valley!

[Mad Mary]

You look like you crawled out of the uncanny valley!
At least I don't fight like I was made out of jelly!
------------------------------------------------
Everyone says that I am the best!

[Marduk]

Not if I feed you this sick voodoo potion.
--------------
My goodness :eek:, can't they train a fighter that's not so butt ugly?Wasn't my last insult good enough...? :(

[Edward VanHelgen]

Everyone says that I am the best!

Best at silly dancing? Oh, i don't protest!

You are as repulsive as the spoiler thread!

[Mad Mary]

You are as repulsive as the spoiler thread!
How appropriate - you soon will be as dead!
--------------------------------------------
You fight like a non-Telltale game designer.

[thatdude98]

How appropriate - you soon will be as dead!
--------------------------------------------
You fight like a non-Telltale game designer.

At least I fight finer!
-----
You're as whiny as the fourms!Q

[Milhouse911]

At least I fight finer!
-----
You're as whiny as the fourms!Q

At least my complaints are of proper decorum.

You're pathetic technique can't compete with my skills!

[thatdude98]

At least my complaints are of proper decorum.

You're pathetic technique can't compete with my skills!

Q!
--------
Even the Dinghy Dog would be able to beat you!

[Mellonhead]

Even the Dinghy Dog would be able to beat you!

He'd throw up if he'd had to eat you!

---

Your parrot is your only admirer!

[thatdude98]

He'd throw up if he'd had to eat you!

---

Your parrot is your only admirer!

Lulullululullulullul! How can you say that when your pants are on fire?
----------------
You're as butt ugly as LeChuck!

[Reubs1]

Lulullululullulullul! How can you say that when your pants are on fire?
----------------
You're as butt ugly as LeChuck!

You nose looks like its been bitten by a duck!

---

I'll make your death quick and painless!

[Eiden]

I'll make your death quick and painless!

You could if you weren't so brain-less

---

I've seen finer swordplay from my two year old niece!

[BobTGoldfish]

You could if you weren't so brain-less

---

I've seen finer swordplay from my two year old niece!

Really? Because you are quivering like a Sheep with no Fleece

---

When This duel is done, it is I that will have Won!

[Mad Mary]

When This duel is done, it is I that will have Won!
Yes, ye're the first to run or the first who's dead and gone!
----------------------------------------------------------
Your clumsiness is insulting me eyes.

[Silverwolfpet]

Yes, ye're the first to run or the first who's dead and gone!
----------------------------------------------------------
Your clumsiness is insulting me eyes.

Well POP them out, so you don't see your own demise! (gruesome, isn't it?)

----------------------------

Your face reminds me of Murray the Skull!

[Anieartalia]

Your face reminds me of Murray the Skull!

Yeah but it's such a shame your face is so dull!
====================

You're so weak, I can beat you with a feather!

[Demra]

Yeah but it's such a shame your face is so dull!
====================

You're so weak, I can beat you with a feather!

That's assuming you could lift it.
---
I fought monkeys with better swordplay than you

[tredlow]

You're so weak, I can beat you with a feather!

Well, a feather would be stronger than your bare hands.

----------------

My mighty sword can cut oceans in half.

[Edward VanHelgen]

My mighty sword can cut oceans in half.

Thats the second stupidest insult i've heard, but at least it gave me laugh.

Hmm.. lemme try that again

My mighty sword can cut oceans in half.

But when you actually try to raise it, you realize you're no strong enough?

So-so...

My mighty sword can cut oceans in half.

And "might" is hard to say when it comes to your behalf.

Oh well

Please just stop with your insults, i'll let you win.

[thatdude98]

Please just stop with your insults, i'll let you win.

Are you sure about that?
----------
I won't give in, not till a thousand weasels jump into your underpants!

[tredlow]

I won't give in, not till a thousand weasels jump into your underpants!

Keep your sick fantasies to yourself, you pervert!

----------------

You will have two glass eyes after I'm done with you!

[Mad Mary]

You will have two glass eyes after I'm done with you!
As I don't wanna yours this is not true!
----------------------------------------
You fight like a drunken monkey.

[tredlow]

You fight like a drunken monkey.

You fight like an anxious ape!

--------------

You fight like a gimpy gibbon.

[MrsBBC]

You fight like an anxious ape!

--------------

You fight like a gimpy gibbon.

Such unneccessary illiteration suggests that you're fibbin'


My pen is mightier than your sword!

[tredlow]

My pen is mightier than your sword!

too bad you've dropped out of kindergarten and never learned how to use it!

----------------------------

I don't care what you say! You're just a generic character passing by, while I'm already a star of 5 games!

[thatdude98]

Keep your sick fantasies to yourself, you pervert

*snigger* *evil giggle* *lolrotfdcssie* that's by far one of the best.

oh yeah, a new comeback and insult:

Don't make me laugh! You couldn't be Guybrush even if he bit you!
-----------------------
I'll steal all your pieces of eight right here, right now. You don't need 'em, do you!

[tredlow]

I'll steal all your pieces of eight right here, right now. You don't need 'em, do you!

If you're practicing to be a bum, you need to work on your customer relation skills.

------------------

My muscles are a fortress of pain!

[mish]

My muscles are a fortress of pain!

------------------

You can tell you've been working out, by your sweat stain!

________________

You're no match for my stinging sword!

[thatdude98]

------------------

You can tell you've been working out, by your sweat stain!

________________

You're no match for my stinging sword!

YOU'RE no match for my monkey horde! I guess we're even then.
---------------------
Do yourself a favor and go jump off a cliff.

[hplikelike]

YOU'RE no match for my monkey horde! I guess we're even then.
---------------------
Do yourself a favor and go jump off a cliff.

I'll take your mammoth corpse to break my fall.


___________________________________________

At this trial by fire, you'll get no appeal!

[ivan11111]

At this trial by fire, you'll get no appeal!

Too bad you're gonna get burned!


My blade has taken the lives of a thousand men!

[scummbeard]

Too bad you're gonna get burned!


My blade has taken the lives of a thousand men!

Nice to meet you, Monsieur Guillotin. Let's see how you handle a sword.

From MY cutlass blade, there is no escape.

[hplikelike]

Nice to meet you, Monsieur Guillotin. Let's see how you handle a sword.

From MY cutlass blade, there is no escape.

I'll take the cutlass, if I could just escape from your breath!

__________________________________________________ _______________________________________

Yer the most boring pirate to ever set sail. zzzzzzzzzzzzz

[saliormoon_dw]

Never thought they'd use a symbol like a monkey!

-------------------

Has the mirror cracked again when you looked into it this morning?

It was already cracked cause you passed it without warning.



-------------------------------------------------------

How dare ye take me on with a plastic sword?

[Mad Mary]

Yer the most boring pirate to ever set sail. zzzzzzzzzzzzz
At least when it's stormy I don't fall off the rail.

How dare ye take me on with a plastic sword?
So my real one will stay clean after I scored.
---------------------------------------------
You think you can beat me? You and what horde?

[thatdude98]

At least when it's stormy I don't fall off the rail.


So my real one will stay clean after I scored.
---------------------------------------------
You think you can beat me? You and what horde?

*Yawn* is that the best you can do? I'm rather bored.
--------------------
I've sailed all seven seas, and nothing could even compare to your ugliness.

[Mad Mary]

I've sailed all seven seas, and nothing could even compare to your ugliness.
It can. You just never learned it in your smugliness.
----------------------------------------------------
Trying to hit me? You'll utterly fail.

[Edward VanHelgen]

Trying to hit me? You'll utterly fail.

But sooner or later my wit will prevail.

You have agility of a drunken gorrila.

[Mad Mary]

You have agility of a drunken gorrila.
That's more than you have. You won't hit a villa.
------------------------------------------------
Your mother's beard is bigger than yours.

[dentbuds]

I fought monkeys with better swordplay than you

So you still practise with your siblings.

Your mother's beard is bigger than yours.

Woah, are we related?

My goodness , can't they train a fighter that's not so butt ugly?

I know. Just look at you!

---

I once saw a play about a drunken bum off the streets. You remind me of him!

[Capotasto]

Didn't he end up rich with booty?
-------------------------------------
You're about as appealing as a screaming Narwhal.

[Melcadrien]

Didn't he end up rich with booty?
-------------------------------------
You're about as appealing as a screaming Narwhal.

I don't like being compared to your mother that way.
------------------------------------------
My blade has bested a thousand men without falling.

[Mad Mary]

My blade has bested a thousand men without falling.
Too bad YOU never bested anyone and always fell.
---------------------------------------------------
You fight like a girl scout.

[bigdondoo]

How appropriate, you look like a thin mint.
-------------------------------------------------------
Substitute Chemistry Teacher!

[Leonilla]

-------------------------------------------------------
Substitute Chemistry Teacher!

I'll teach you a lesson you won't soon forget!
-----------------------------------------
Hanging's too good for a dog like you!

[nofacej]

How can this be, we've barely begun, and you already have a stitch?
----------------------------------------------------------
You only look tough because your mum was an ugly b@$#!*

I speak in first hand when I say you mother is impure.
------------------------------------------------------------
There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure!*

1. Modified this line from one in the game No More Heroes
2. Courtesy of Jack E. Leonard

Edit:
Does it comply with Rule 9 now?

[Marduk]

You only look tough because your mum was an ugly bitch!* Rule 9 There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure!* Rule 8.

I suppose I should make rule 8 clearer. What I meant by # Plagiarism, just not from other users on this forum :P (use your best judgement. If that isn’t enough ask the user in question). was "Don't steal insults from other members of the forums". Using famous quotes is ok. (Somebody already ripped off Jack Leanard. I think it was me. Good show on giving him credit, though).

[dentbuds]

You fight like a girl scout.

Your as cowerdly as one.

---

Getting pretty late. Isn't it past your bedtime?

[nofacej]

Getting pretty late. Isn't it past your bedtime?
Getting tired old timer? I'm still feeling sublime!

Hanging's too good for a dog like you!
Funny, that insult stunk worse than dog poo!
---------------------------------------------
I've seen more teeth on a parrot!

[thatdude98]

Getting tired old timer? I'm still feeling sublime!


Funny, that insult stunk worse than dog poo!
---------------------------------------------
I've seen more teeth on a parrot!

That was before you broke all yours on a carrot.
-------------------------
I insult you out of jealousy and spite! (because I'm probably not going to get to play SOMI: SE for weeks.)

[Mad Mary]

I've seen more teeth on a parrot!
So you lost your denture again?
(Or: When your mother chewed a carrot?)

EDIT: ooops, I was a bit slow...
I insult you out of jealousy and spite! (because I'm probably not going to get to play SOMI: SE for weeks.)
Jealous of me? Well, that's alright.
-----------------------------------------
You're the worst pirate I have ever fought.

[Edward VanHelgen]

You're the worst pirate I have ever fought.

You actually HANDLE A SWORD? Who would have tought :p

Stop dancing like baboon on stage.

[Mad Mary]

Stop dancing like baboon on stage.
Stop fencing like a raccoon in a cage!
(Doesn't make much sense, I know, but I got three rhymes after all. ;))
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Prepare to die - now you'll feel my rage!

[Edward VanHelgen]

Stop fencing like a raccoon in a cage!
(Doesn't make much sense, I know, but I got three rhymes after all. ;))

lol, nah its a good one, but funny thing i was thinking to say some insult involing raccoon as well, something about the smell probably :D but then change it to the baboon one :p

[tmesis]

Prepare to die - now you'll feel my rage!

That's a line you've been peddling since the ice age!

----------

You're about as fearsome as a cat in a blanket.

[Juicius Maximus]

You're about as fearsome as a cat in a blanket.

Is it a really EVIL looking blanket?

-------------------

Sorry, couldn't resist!

[thatdude98]

Is it a really EVIL looking blanket?

-------------------

Sorry, couldn't resist!

Murray...

[Marduk]

Sorry, couldn't resist!

STOP! Cease and desist!


(I know this probably wasn't supposed to be an insults but I couldn't resist :P)

[Melcadrien]

I don't see an insult from you marduk. Oh well, moving on.
----------------------------
Where did you get your fencing skills from, a cereal box?

[Leetstuff]

I don't see an insult from you marduk. Oh well, moving on.
----------------------------
Where did you get your fencing skills from, a cereal box?

At least mine were good, yours came with those socks?
--------------------------------------------------
Try not to faint when you see your blood!

[hplikelike]

At least mine were good, yours came with those socks?
--------------------------------------------------
Try not to faint when you see your blood!

Try not to faint when feel my strength!

________________________________________________

Give up now; you have no hope.

[bigdondoo]

Give up now; you have no hope.

Talking to yourself? You stupid dope!
-----------------------------------------------
Is that your nose or is it your sword?

[thatdude98]

Talking to yourself? You stupid dope!
-----------------------------------------------
Is that your nose or is it your sword?

Doesn't matter. Either way things are about to get messy.
-----------------------------------
You look like something the monkey dragged in!

[octochan]

While you're more like something monkeys tend to fling.
_____________________________________________

Do you usually look like that, or did someone put a bucket of mud over your door?

[Irishmile]

Funny you mention Monkeys because someone told me you played Monkey Combat and LIKED IT!!

[IronJawbone]

While you're more like something monkeys tend to fling.
_____________________________________________

Do you usually look like that, or did someone put a bucket of mud over your door?

Joke's on you. That's not mud!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Your lack of wit is why Insult sword fighting is getting boring!

[thatdude98]

who, octochan or me?

[NTQ]

[QUOTE=I
Your lack of wit is why Insult sword fighting is getting boring![/QUOTE]

Your dull tongue sounds like a drunk pirate snoring.

[thatdude98]

Your just plain boring.
-----------------
If my choices were to fight you or walk the plank, I'd do the latter.

[Melcadrien]

I'd agree, you smell worse than my uncle Chuck.
--------------------------------------------------
Fighting you is like fighting an old man.

[hplikelike]

I'd agree, you smell worse than my uncle Chuck.
--------------------------------------------------
Fighting you is like fighting an old man.

My crew calls me "Old Man Rivers," cause I outlive everyone of my opponents.

(Actually, that sounds better as a started insult then a response. So...)

_________________________________________________

My crew calls me "Old Man Rivers," cause I outlive everyone of my opponents.

[Melcadrien]

You should be thinking of a retirement home gramps.
------------------------------------------------------
Which hand am I going to beat you with, my left or my right?

[viz]

You should be thinking of a retirement home gramps.
------------------------------------------------------
Which hand am I going to beat you with, my left or my right?

With moves like that, you should be more concerned with your sight!

------

My walls are lined with the skulls of my enemies!

[Melcadrien]

Your friends are laughing behind your back because your a BONE-head.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Just to let you know I got rich off of fighting losers like you.

[viz]

Your friends are laughing behind your back because your a BONE-head.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Just to let you know I got rich off of fighting losers like you.

Well it's time to pay up, your debts are long overdue!

---

Soon you'll be wearing your ship as a coffin at the bottom of the ocean!

[Mad Mary]

Soon you'll be wearing your ship as a coffin at the bottom of the ocean!
At least my ship's not inside a bottle but sailing the seas, always in motion.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'd rather kiss a rat than being your pal.