9/11
I'm a sucker for Don Knotts, and I'm a sucker for Tim Conway, but I'm an even bigger sucker for Don Knotts and Tim Conway together. I'm an even bigger sucker for Harvey Korman and Tim Conway together but that has nothing to do with this. I'll even sit through the Apple Dumpling Gang Rides Again for these two. Their movies are just a guilty pleasure for me. I actually like this one more than the Apple Dumpling Gang series. I'm also a huge sucker for horror-mystery-comedies. The villain in this film is offing people off in horrible ways and leaving notes behind taunting the two bumbling detectives on the case- oh and the villain looks like Ghostface. You could honestly call this movie Knotts and Conway Meet Ghostface. The gags are simple but made hilarious by these two masters and their comedic timing, with the movie a bit of a mix between Clue and The Pink Panther. The only problem I have with this one is the opening credits, which rip off The Pink Panther with an animated sequence that often fails to be funny, which is weird because the rest of the film
is funny. However, I can't laugh at a cartoon sequence where someone plants a bomb, then the heroes light the bomb thinking it is a candle, and stare at it for what seems like ten full seconds with blank expressions. A person with brain damage would have at least stopped staring at the damn bomb before it went off. No matter how many times you do it, animating a villain blowing up the heroes with bombs isn't funny, especially not when its that one gag repeated over and over. Other than that sucky cartoon in the credits, which can be skipped over, this movie is seriously worth a look. It's a really fun time with a couple of genuinely creepy moments.
8/11
Holy crapping crap crapping crap. This movie. Dagon can go piss on itself. This is how you make a Lovecraft movie. This movie is badass. This movie made me jump by opening a door. This ranks right next to In the Mouth of Madness and Call of Cthulhu for me as one of the best Cthulhu Mythos films I have ever seen in my
life. It brings the Mythos both to modern times and Victorian era times and does both masterfully. The music is excellent. The CGI and special effects are excellent, but not overblown or overused. I'm pretty sure a lot of practical effects were used as well. The Gothic lighting and atmosphere is fantastic. This is a slow burner Gothic horror film like the brilliant ones of old that I miss so dearly. It often has twinges of Hammer horror, Alone in the Dark (the game), Scratches, and stories of that sort. Some of it can seem outdated at times, but its not afraid to be more like the classic horror films we all love. The manor that the movie surrounds is ripped straight from the first Alone in the Dark video game. I saw the camera shake a bit in one scene, but it was barely noticeable. Most of the actors are awesome, especially Mr. Valdemar and Mr. Crowley, who I thought were standouts. The actor who plays Mr. Crowley, the Lovecraft wizard of sorts in the film, plays such a charismatic villain. He's devilishly sweet but plays a slight hint of horrid malice underneath it all with panache. I half expected him to spout two curly mustaches on his upper lip from nowhere. That's not a spoiler; there is no doubt the man is a villain as soon as you see him. It's like trying to be surprised when Ben Kingsley tries to kill you. Bald people with hollow voices equal bad news in Lovecraft's world. However, a couple of the actors in the modern era setting are hokey enough to bug the shit out of me. Specifically, 'Laurel and Hardy'. No, Laurel and Hardy are not in the film, but if you watch the film, you'll know what I mean. The writing is excellent for the most part as well.
This is Lovecraft done right and I will not excuse any Lovecraft fan who passes this film up. I was genuinely creeped out by this film more than once. I hate that it shows the monsters somewhat but in a way I feel that that suits this film rather well, and the effects are, as I said, not overblown but are so well done. They show just the right amount without going too far. My only other complaint with the film is that
it ends on a very Lovecraftian cliffhanger and continues in a sequel that doesn't come out until later this month. This is the only reason I didn't give it a 9,
because I felt I have not seen the entire story yet.