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Old 08/22/2011, 08:22 am   #25
Sarendor
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Israel
Posts: 165
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tredlow View Post
JOKE WAR!

The pope, a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. Then the bartender said "Hey, is this some kind of joke?".
A priest, a cadi and a rabbi walk into a bar. The barman asks: 'Aren't you tired of this already?'


I hope no one is offended by the following joke. The nationalities could have been chosen differently, and I was too lazy to thing of another way to present it.

Three engineers work on a skyscrapper. Each of them is from a different country: America, France and the Netherlands. They all bring their breakfast from their home. One day, they get tired of their food.
The Frenchman says: 'If I open my bag tomorrow and find a croissant again, I am jumping from the top floor of this very skyscrapper!'
The Dutchman says: 'If I open my bag tomorrow and find potato chips again, I am jumping from the top floor of this very skyscrapper!'
The American man says: 'If I open my bag tomorrow and find a peanut butter sandwich again... Whatever, I am jumping from the top floor of this very skyscrapper.'
A day later, the Frenchman finds he got a croissant. He jumps from the skyscrapper. (AAAAAAAAAAH THUD!!) The Dutchman finds his wife sent him potato chips again. He, too, jumps from the skyscrapper. The American man opens his sandwich and finds peanut butter. He also jumps.
Some days later, their widows come together to talk about the tragedy.
The French widow says: 'Oh, if I only knew what he was going to do, I would have packed him a camembert sandwich, or a bagguette, or anything!'
The Dutch widow says: 'Why couldn't he tell me he didn't want chips? If I knew it, I would have sent him a goudse sandwich, or mussels, or anything! Alas, why didn't he tell me?'
The American widow says: 'If only he would have tell me, I would have made sure he got something else. Alas, he packed the breakfast himself.'

Here is a Juha joke that I like:
Juha was asked by the ruler Timur to take a part in a horse race for him. Juha came to the race with a the oldest horse in the stable. When Timur saw what horse Juha picked, he told him: 'Are you out of your mind, Juha? This is a horse race, and every man knows that old horses are slower than fresh ones!'
Juha answered: 'Ah, but your majesty! As the old saying goes: None is smarter than an experienced person. Ten years ago, I would ride this horse on any race. Never lost a run!'
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