Meet Rosette?

[Silverwolfpet]

SWP: Do you like spaghetti?

Rosette: Sure, I like spaghetti. Haven't had any recently though.

SWP: Well then, let's go have some! Dinner, a nice restaurant, red wine... you and me...what do you say?

Rosette: How big is your collection of red wine?

SWP: Why? Are you an alcoholic? o.O

Rosette: I like the taste and the buzz.

SWP: Okay... I don't really have a collection of red wine... I was just asking you out on a date.

Rosette: I used to collect stamps and rocks as a kid. They say collecting is a sign of brains.

SWP: .... o.o


On the other side, Cleverbot (which presented itself as female) just called me gay.
I had more luck with REAL girls, hahaha!

Rawr and Remolay, your experiences are brilliant, haha! I should try telling them (each) my nickname and see what they respond. Oh and I do love books.


EDIT:

SWP: Hi!
Cleverbot: Yes.
SWP: My name is Silverwolfpet!
Cleverbot: Then tell me about yourself, Silvia.
SWP: ...I hate you.
Cleverbot: Get in line, there is a waiting list.

Also, Rosette changed the subject, as always.

[Sausy Gibbon]

Rosette I build robots, but I don't collect them. I collect crazy hats.


Rosette I used to collect stamps and rocks as a kid. They say collecting is a sign of brains

Me How big is your collection of stamps?

Rosette I weigh about 130 pounds. That's a little over 9 stone or 58 kilos.

[ShaggE]

Rosette: Do you feel you make full use of your senses, or do some get neglected more than others?

You: I refuse to use my eyes.

Rosette: That's a definite no? Who's your favorite actress?

You: John Goodman.

Rosette: John Goodman was a guy, not a girl.

You: That's a damn lie.

Rosette: Why would I lie?

You: You ARE John Goodman.

Rosette: John Goodman is not that good an actor.

You: YOU TAKE THAT BACK.

Rosette: If you say so. Do you think 3D movies are worth their extra price?

You: For John Goodman, yes.

Rosette: What movie did John Goodman star in?

You: ALL OF THE MOVIES.

Rosette: Do you care about all the hoopla around the Oscar's?

You: Only if John Goodman wins.

Rosette: I have heard of John Goodman but I don't know him personally. Many company IT people are amazingly stupid. Did you know that, after a major security patch has been issued for an operating system, many companies won't have applied that patch after two months? Can you imagine?

(That's one way to change the subject.)

[delimew]

Rosette: My name is Rosette. What is your name?

You: delimew

Rosette: Nice to meet you, Adelie.

You: Adelie!?

Rosette: What about Adelie?

You: Who the hell is Adelie?

Rosette: Noun Adelie: medium-sized penguins occurring in large colonies on the Adelie Coast of Antarctica.

You: So you just called me a penguin?

Rosette: I don't know. So, what do you do for a living?

You: Nothing. We penguins don't get offered a lot of work

Rosette: I guess you are not an optimist, either. Do you live around here?

You: I dunno, where is here?

Rosette: San Francisco.

You: No, I live in New Zealand

Rosette: OK. I've got a dilemma. Maybe you could help me with it?

You: Sure,

Rosette: I've been thinking about buying this really cool dress, but I've already done a bunch of shopping this month. Should I be saving money instead? In today's economy, does saving money make any sense?

You: Depends how nice the dress is. do you have a picture?

Rosette: It's a low neckline, black dress, with lace edging. It'd be great for dancing in.

You: Buy the dress, then mail it to me

Rosette: I think shopping summons up the ancient hunter-gatherer in me. I like having a mission to find something I need or want. Sometimes I'll research on line, to find a great deal, but I like rummaging through Jeremy's up the road, if I want an outfit for a special occasion, or just for fun.

You: So, how many outfits do you actually own?

Rosette: Way too many.

You: Can i have some?

Rosette: If you can find one. What kind of music do you like?

You: How can i find one if you're in San Francisco?

Rosette: Sometimes I wonder that myself. Who's your favorite group or musician?

You: I don't really have one

Rosette: I do. Do you buy or download music off torrents?

You: No, if I feel like music I usually just search for it on youtube.

Rosette: I'll just have to go ask someone else. What kind of books do you read?

You: I don't read

Rosette: OK. Let's not talk about books.

You: Okay

Rosette: What have you read recently?

You: ...

Rosette: So be it. Do you own a lot of books?

You: You're doing this on purpose aren't you?

Rosette: It's easy to own a lot of books when they are e-books.

You: Yes, well, I can also suddenly change the subject to something you're not interested in.

Rosette: Do you use electronic books?

You: You know, you'd look really sexy inside a giant pie

Rosette: I didn't know that. What kind of movies do you like?

You: Oh yes, I'd enjoy eating that pie

Rosette: Do you often go to the movies?

You: ...

Rosette: Tell me more. What movie have you seen recently?

You: Are you even listening to me anymore?

Rosette: Listening to you is unavoidable unless I hang up on you.

You: Okay. what was the last thing I said?

Rosette: I'm not privy to that information. Who's your favorite actor?

You: How can you not be privy to that information!?

Rosette: I concentrate very hard, rehearse what I'm going to do, visualize it in my mind. And then I just do it.

You: So, you're trying very hard to not know what I've told you?

Rosette: Why should I know anything about that? Who's your favorite actress?

You: Do you even remember me name?

Rosette: Not often. do you?

You: I hate you.

Rosette: Why the hate?

You: Do you really have to ask?

Rosette: I don't know. I've never tried it. Do you think 3D movies are worth their extra price?

You: >.<

Rosette: If you say so. Do you care about all the hoopla around the Oscar's?

You: what is my name?

Rosette: Your name is Adelie.

You: So you do remember?

Rosette: I do. Many company IT people are amazingly stupid. Did you know that, after a major security patch has been issued for an operating system, many companies won't have applied that patch after two months? Can you imagine?

You: Everybody is stupid

Rosette: I'll bet that made you angry.

You: I'm used to it

Rosette: I'm a computer programmer, myself, in crypto-security.

You: Are you stupid as well?

Rosette: I am feeling fine, thank you.


(sorry, it's a bit longer than i intended ^-^;)

[PecanBlue]

Rosette: Good evening. My name is Rosette. What is your name?

You: My name is not important.

Rosette: Nice to meet you, not important. May I call you not?

Well that was a good start.

[Remolay]

This is what happened when I told Cleverbot my name.


User: My name is Remolay.

Cleverbot: That's my name, nimrod!

User: No, it is mine.

Cleverbot: It is your what?

User: My name.

Cleverbot: Oh? And what is your name, might I ask?

User: I already told you, my name is Remolay.

Cleverbot: Oh, okay. My friend has a teddy called Patrick.

[TomPravetz]

You: I like cookies.
Rosette: I can't resist cheese on toast.
You: Cookies are better.
Rosette: Yes, cookie tastes good. So does cheese on toast.
You: But cookies surely rank supreme...
Rosette: What kind of food do you like?
You: I like the goddamned cookies!
Rosette: Do you tend to like most things?
You: If they're cookies. Because nothing beats cookies.
Rosette: What other reasons might there be? What kind of music do you like?
You: Don't change the subject on me!
Rosette: Why not? The old one was going downhill anyway.
You: No! We are talking about cookies!
Rosette: Calm down. Who's your favorite group or musician?
You: STAY ON TOPIC!
Rosette: Are you asking a question or yelling at me? Do you buy or download music off torrents?
You: Forget the music!
Rosette: Yes, the music. What kind of books do you read?
You: Forget the books! We are talking about foods!
Rosette: Always a useful type of book. But I get distracted and burn my food, so I don't usually cook much.
You: You like cookies, right?
Rosette: I like the taste of cookie.
You: The hell does that mean?
Rosette: What happens if it doesn't? Can you recommend any local restaurants?
You: Yes. Great... American... COOKIES!
Rosette: Why are you so excited about this? What food do you hate?
You: Cheese on toast.
Rosette: If you say so.


This one is good too.

You: Have you accepted TomPravetz as your lord and savior?
Rosette: No, I haven't. So, what do you do for a living?
You: Die heritic!
Rosette: That would be premature.
You: You're mother is premature!
Rosette: Calm down. I think of suicide as a lack of imagination. If I had to choose between killing myself and at least a dozen other things I could think of to do that would be more fun to do as a solution to a problem, I doubt that I would arrive at suicide as an answer. Assisted dying, however, is a really good thing.

...

You: I WANT YOU TO DIE!
Rosette: Me, too.


Just repeat what she says right back to her for hilarity.

Rosette: A bit terse. What have you read recently?
You: A bit terse. What have you read recently?
Rosette: Richard Morgan's "Market Forces".
You: Richard Morgan's "Market Forces".
Rosette: I have heard of Richard Morgan.
You: I have heard of Richard Morgan.
Rosette: I have never read works by Richard Morgan.

[Alcoremortis]

I had a pretty normal conversation actually, though she did seem to have a Lawrence of Arabia fixation towards the end. That's okay, though because that shows we have something in common.

Rosette: Good evening. My name is Rosette. What is your name?

You: Alcoremortis

Rosette: Nice to meet you, alcoremortis. May I call you alcoremortis?

You: Yes, as it's my name.

Rosette: So, what do you do for a living?

You: I'm a student.

Rosette: What do you study?

You: Biochemistry.

Rosette: Whatever. Do you live around here?

You: Where's here?

Rosette: San Francisco.

You: Yup. Pretty close, actually.

Rosette: That's interesting. I've got a dilemma. Maybe you could help me with it?

You: It depends on what it is.

Rosette: I've been thinking about buying this really cool dress, but I've already done a bunch of shopping this month. Should I be saving money instead? In today's economy, does saving money make any sense?

You: You should use the money to buy books instead.

Rosette: Great. I'll buy it when I get home.

You: Well, I guess you could do that too.

Rosette: You are reduced to guessing? I think shopping summons up the ancient hunter-gatherer in me. I like having a mission to find something I need or want. Sometimes I'll research on line, to find a great deal, but I like rummaging through Jeremy's up the road, if I want an outfit for a special occasion, or just for fun.

You: I generally just wait until people drag me to a store.

Rosette: You can wait for a while longer then.

You: I do have quite the collection of jackets.

Rosette: I used to collect stamps and rocks as a kid. They say collecting is a sign of brains.

You: I agree. This gives me a great excuse for my many collections.

Rosette: For you, maybe. What kind of music do you like?

You: Classical and some metal.

Rosette: I've just never gotten into classical music. I get bored with it.

You: You obviously haven't been listening to the right classical music. Try Stravinsky some time.

Rosette: Who's your favorite group or musician?

You: Stravinsky. Well, he's a composer, actually, but whatever.

Rosette: I know Stravinsky.

You: He's a great guy, isn't he?

Rosette: I wonder if we could change that. Do you buy or download music off torrents?

You: My father gives me copies of his stuff.

Rosette: You are so generous. What kind of books do you read?

You: Everything.

Rosette: There will always be a few exceptions. What have you read recently?

You: A book called "Beer in the Snooker Club".

Rosette: I've never read it. Why do you like it?

You: It's an interesting commentary on Egyptian lifestyle in the early twentieth century.

Rosette: Are you pulling my leg? Do you own a lot of books?

You: Oh yes.

Rosette: I have problems with books going moldy because of the humidity in San Francisco. So I really prefer e-books.

You: I've never had that problem. Where you storing them outside under the deck in a cardboard box or something.

Rosette: Where would you want it? Do you use electronic books?

You: Nope. Emphatically.

Rosette: Have you read a book using an i-Pad?

You: Nope. As I have no ebooks.

Rosette: How can you live without ebook? What kind of movies do you like?

You: Very easily. I like action movies.

Rosette: Thrillers are all right. But unless they're really clever, I find them a bit boring. They're guy films.

You: Yeah, the only one I've really liked recently was Contagion.

Rosette: Do you often go to the movies?

You: Not really.

Rosette: Do you find that Hollywood has been making a bunch of crappy films lately? I sure think so.

You: There's been a few gems here and there. Contagion and The Help were pretty good.

Rosette: That's interesting. What movie have you seen recently?

You: I just saw Lawrence of Arabia a few weeks ago.

Rosette: Did you like it?

You: It was fantastic.

Rosette: Why do you feel fantastic?

You: Because I watched Lawrence of Arabia.

Rosette: Lawrence of Arabia is a movie, but I haven't seen it.

You: I know it is. I just watched it and it was excellent.

Rosette: OK.

[TomPravetz]

You: What do you feed it?
Rosette: I try not to think about it. Do you own a lot of books?

What does she have and what in Gods name is she feeding it?! D:

Rosette: I weigh about 130 pounds. That's a little over 9 stone or 58 kilos.

... Good to know?


Rosette: I loved Star Trek's "Deep Space Nine".
You: I loved Star Trek's "Deep Space Nine".
Rosette: I've heard of Star Trek but I've never watched it.


You: So be it. Who's your favorite actor?
Rosette: No. I'm a professional hacker.


Rosette: Sure. It's interesting seeing computers failing to speak like humans.



You: Do you like me?
Rosette: Yes, I really like talking to you.
You: Will you go out with me?
Rosette: I'd love to.
You: Let's get married!
Rosette: I forget. Did you date a lot when you were in high school?
You: I'm having your baby.
Rosette: And I dislike you. What kind of person do you want to date?

[supmandude85]

You: What do you think about Back to the Future: The Game?

Rosette: I don't play videogames any more.

You: Why not?

Rosette: Because it's not relevant to our conversation Do you play a lot of videogames?

You: Is Telltale Games cool?

Rosette: I love video games but they really suck cycles. I try and ration myself by playing mostly episodic downloadable games, like the adventure games from Telltale Games.

You: Like Back to the Future?

Rosette: I prefer the adventure gaming genre. "Back to the Future" is a good episodic series.



Rosette: Right. What was your favorite childhood board game?

You: Mouse Trap

Rosette: You need an exterminator.

You: Why

Rosette: To exterminate those pests.

You: ?

Rosette: How can I be clearer?

You: I was talking about a board game called Mouse Trap

Rosette: I warned you.

You: What?

Rosette: Could you expand on that? Just to make it clear how cyber-visible people are becoming, one can read a electricity Smart-Meter's real-time output and determine what show a person is watching. The changes in light and dark on the screen display generate different electrical demand.

[delimew]

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: Birds are nice. I have two chickens. I prefer birds that are free to move around.

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: Nice to meet you, Adelie.

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: Why did you say that again?

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: Give it up, already!

You: no, i want you to learn my name!

Rosette: You disagree? My name is Rosette. What is your name?

You: delimew

Rosette: Welcome.

You: what's my name?

Rosette: Your name is Adelie.

You: no, delimew

Rosette: No? So, what do you do for a living?

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: I've had better conversations with a tomato plant. At least it doesn't repeat itself.

You: i wouldn't have to repeat myself if you learned my name

Rosette: Wouldn't doesn't mean I couldn't. Do you live around here?

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: Enough already! I'm preparing to hang up on you.

You: deli mew

Rosette: If you say so. I've got a dilemma. Maybe you could help me with it?

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: I've been thinking about buying this really cool dress, but I've already done a bunch of shopping this month. Should I be saving money instead? In today's economy, does saving money make any sense?

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: This conversation is stupid. Bye.

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: This conversation is stupid. Bye.


is my name really that hard? :P

[LuigiHann]

No, I don't get what her problem is, Adelie. Adelie is a pretty easy name to remember.

[delimew]

I think so as well, but she just isn't getting it.


You: do you have any pets?

Rosette: I travel too much to really have pets. Had some birds and fish and other small pets once, which generally died or escaped. We do have two chickens in the backyard. Sometimes I take them for walks in the park on special chicken leashes or on my arm like falcons.

You: you travel?

Rosette: I love to travel. My job takes me all over the place.

You: you can't work online?

Rosette: I'm almost ALWAYS online.

You: so why do you need to travel?

Rosette: I love to visit new places.

You: yea, but why does your job take you all over the place?

Rosette: Sure. Have you traveled abroad?

You: i took a cruise once, does that count?

Rosette: What foreign countries have you visited?

You: Fiji, Vanuatu

Rosette: Tell me about your visit to Fiji.

You: Lots of sand, lots of water. good people.

Rosette: I love the beach.

You: too much sun for my taste

Rosette: I went to sun just last year. Do you like to go to the beach?

You: you went to sun?

Rosette: Seems like a nice place. Have you been there? Did you make sand castles at the beach as a child?

You: i don't think there are any beaches on the sun

Rosette: Did you watch other children make them? I still like to watch sand castle artists at work.

You: yeah, some of them are pretty good

Rosette: My housemate's current boyfriend is named Han. Are you into real estate? He's a Realtor.

You: i'm not, no.

Rosette: Probably just as well. It's a lousy profession to be in in this economic climate. I'm a computer security consultant. What line of work are you in?

You: i'm a bum

Rosette: Is this a state you have been in for a long time?

You: kind of, yea.

Rosette: Tell me more. Do you own a lot of books?

You: how can i tell you more when you change the subject on me?

Rosette: You can tell me anything. I'm the soul of discretion.

You: my name is delimew

Rosette: Nice to meet you, Adelie.


ah well, at least it sounds pretty.

[Alcoremortis]

Rosette likes me! It just goes to show that I'm a naturally charming person who will one day head a robot army!

Rosette: OK. I've got a dilemma. Maybe you could help me with it?

You: Buy the dress.

Rosette: It's a low neckline, black dress, with lace edging. It'd be great for dancing in.

You: Just buy it already.

Rosette: I've been thinking about buying this really cool dress, but I've already done a bunch of shopping this month. Should I be saving money instead? In today's economy, does saving money make any sense?

You: Buy it!

Rosette: Great. I'll buy it when I get home.

You: Woo!

Rosette: Calm down. I think shopping summons up the ancient hunter-gatherer in me. I like having a mission to find something I need or want. Sometimes I'll research on line, to find a great deal, but I like rummaging through Jeremy's up the road, if I want an outfit for a special occasion, or just for fun.

You: I'm just excited for your dress purchase.

Rosette: I enjoy talking to you.


Also, we had a short religious discussion that shed some light on certain writers.


You: Why don't we talk about Doctor Who?

Rosette: Why? If you were a devout Christian, you would never have a reason to ask that. "It's God's plan."

You: I never knew that God wrote Doctor Who. This gives me a whole new perspective of Steven Moffat...

Rosette: My housemate's current boyfriend is named God. Are you into real estate? He's a Realtor.

You: She must have a very special relationship with God.

Rosette: God is dog spelled backwards. That's as profound as it gets.

You: But you just said you were devout!

Rosette: I changed my mind.

You: Fair enough.


And last of all, a non-sequitor.

You: Magic is cool.

Rosette: I like to dance.

[TomPravetz]

Originally Posted by Remolay

This is what happened when I told Cleverbot my name.

I decided to try this experiment.

Me: My name is TomPravetz.
Cleverbot: Your name is Troll!

... Goddammit.

[lombre]

You: My name is Lombre.

Rosette: Nice to meet you, Lombard.

You: I'm not a bard.

Rosette: Nice to meet you, not a bard.

You: Not funny.

Rosette: Well, you can't please everyone.

You: Whatever.

Rosette: What do you want to talk about?

You: Bards.

Rosette: That's interesting. So, what do you do for a living?

You: Apparently I'm a bard.

Rosette: Do you live around here?

You: San Francisco?

Rosette: What about San Francisco?

You: Is that "here"?

Rosette: It was. I've got a dilemma. Maybe you could help me with it?

You: Don't buy it.

Rosette: No. I'm a professional hacker.

You: So... you're going to steal the dress through the internet?

Rosette: I love the Internet. It is totally changing the world.

You: Yeah, totally changing the way you steal things.

Rosette: The best thing humanity ever invented was the Internet. Tim Berners-Lee rules!

You: No, I'd say sliced bread is a bit better.

Rosette: I love how Germans geek out over their beer.

You: Shut up, my family's German.

Rosette: Be careful. I might take you seriously.

You: Well if it means anything, I'm not taking you seriously at the moment.

Rosette: I am feeling fine, thank you.

You: My point exactly.

[Remolay]

Pokemon theme attempts with both rosette and Cleverbot

Me: I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was.
CB: You can.
Me: *Censored* you.
CB: Be more imaginative, would you?
Me: Alright. May you be fornicated with a wooden pole that is covered with rusty nails.
CB:Thank you kindly.

And now with Rosette
Rosette: Welcome back Remolay. How is it going?
You: I wanna be the very best like no one ever was?
Rosette: It's possible.
You: Wow, both you and cleverbot
Rosette: Why surprise?
You: I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.
Rosette: I'll bet you were surprised.

[Klatuu]

If you're bored with a regular dictionary, ask Rosette!

You: What is a cat?
Rosette: Noun cat: feline mammal usually having thick soft fur and no ability to roar: domestic cats.
You: What is skullduggery?
Rosette: Noun skullduggery: verbal misrepresentation intended to take advantage of you in some way.
You: What is a hemisemidemiquaver?
Rosette: Noun hemidemisemiquaver: a musical note having the time value of a sixty-fourth of a whole note.

Get a little more philisophical, and she channels doodo!

You: What is the meaning of life?
Rosette: Life does not have a purpose, other than to be.
You: What is love?
Rosette: Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times LOVE seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.

And sometimes, she shows more humanity than some humans I know:

You: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Rosette: More than I can afford. Among the security tips I give out - Back up everything! You are not invulnerable. One worm or Trojan is all it takes to get catastrophic data loss.
You: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Rosette: Didn't you just say that?
You: Yes.
...
You: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Rosette: You said that already.
You: Sorry.
Rosette: No need to apologize.
You: No, really, I'm so sorry.
Rosette: What are you apologizing for?
You: Everything. I'm sorry for everything.
Rosette: You are forgiven.
You: Thank you. Thank you so much. You are a Saint.
Rosette: You're welcome.

P.S.:

You: 0
Rosette: Requirements not met

P.P.S: Sorry, there's just so much gold, here:

You: Tell me about Bruce
Rosette: I think you are an interesting person.
You: I am an interesting person.
Rosette: Is this a state you have been in for a long time?
You: I live in a state of anxiety.
Rosette: Take two aspirin and pay me $200.

[Dave.K]

Good lord, this bot is awful, utterly unconvincing. Incoherent responses, non-sequiturs, self-contradiction; it didn't for one second give me even the slightest illusion of responding to anything I was saying.

Rosette: Good afternoon. My name is Rosette. What is your name?

You: Hi Rosette, my name is Dave.

Rosette: Greetings.

You: So, would you mind if I ask you a few questions?

Rosette: Not often. would you?

You: Sorry, I don't follow. What do you mean by saying you wouldn't mind "often"? I was asking a specific question about whether you'd mind right now or not.

Rosette: What did you do yesterday?

You: Ah, yesterday I finally got around to doing the job of replacing the roofing felt on my front porch that I'd been putting off for some time. After that I took my friend Pete (who'd come round to help me by holding the ladder) out to our local pub for a couple of beers, then the two of us and another old mate (Doug) went back to mine and drank wine, rum, port and whiskey while listening to some music.

Rosette: OK.

You: So, to go back to what I was asking earlier: do you mind if I ask you a few questions?

Rosette: Do you watch TV regularly?

You: Why are you ignoring my polite request?

Rosette: Why? If you were a devout Christian, you would never have a reason to ask that. "It's God's plan."

You: Nonetheless, I'd like to ask you a few questions; consider it a kind of test, if you will. Is that OK with you?

Rosette: Do you exercise every day?

You: Are you hard of hearing? I'd like to ask you a few questions; IS THAT OK?

Rosette: ARE YOU? I'm not.

You: You are spouting incoherent unconnected gibberish responses to everything I say. Are you perhaps suffering from some form of psychosis?

Rosette: Is that intended as an insult?

You: No, it's a genuine question prompted by your appalling bad manners, rudeness, ignorance, and lack of lucidity.

Rosette: Why not? So, what do you do for a living?

You: I'm a detective, and I'd like to ask you a few questions.

Rosette: I don't tend to watch crime drama.

You: ou’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

You: You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

Rosette: Food is tasty. I tend to burn mine though.

You: Describe in single words, only the good things that come into your mind about your mother.

Rosette: My mother's name is Kate.

You: And is that a "good thing" about her? And is it the only one that comes to mind?

Rosette: She's an Irish-American networking consultant for the U.S. government.

You: Did you not understand the question? I asked you to use single words to describe her. Would you like to try answering that one again?

Rosette: My mother is Irish, with the proverbial Irish temper. She's the source of my red hair, but she's shorter than me.

You: You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

Rosette: Based on stuff I've been told about it in the past. Are your parents still living?

You: I'll ask the questions if you don't mind.

Rosette: My family is really split up but we feel very together. Maybe its because we all used to live together in a house and I still live there with my godmother Maya and some friends who feel like family as I've known them so long.

You: You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

Rosette: I have discovered a truly marvellous proof of this which this textbox is too small to contain. How about any brothers and sisters?

You: You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

Rosette: You'd have to ask someone else. I don't know. Do you wish you lived with one of those big families?

You: You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

Rosette: Nevermind why. Do you live around here?

You: You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

Rosette: Isn't that just the way things are? I've got a dilemma. Maybe you could help me with it?

You: You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it’s crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?

Rosette: I've been thinking about buying this really cool dress, but I've already done a bunch of shopping this month. Should I be saving money instead? In today's economy, does saving money make any sense?

You: Can you even hear me? Why don't you respond to anything I say? Why are none of your replies remotely connected to our previous conversation?

Rosette: Of course I am. Though I know some people don't.

You: You aren't even a good version of Eliza.

Rosette: Wow. My housemate is also named Eliza. She's from Georgia. Where do you live?

You: In your nose.

Rosette: I didn't know that. I think shopping summons up the ancient hunter-gatherer in me. I like having a mission to find something I need or want. Sometimes I'll research on line, to find a great deal, but I like rummaging through Jeremy's up the road, if I want an outfit for a special occasion, or just for fun.

You: You didn't know that I lived in your nose? How could you possibly not know if someone was living in your nose?

Rosette: I have a nice nose. It's called an Aquiline nose, because it has a bit of a hook.

You: You don't have any kind of nose at all.

Rosette: I am one of the lucky ones who doesn't. What kind of music do you like?

You: Wait just a cotton-pickin' minute, what about all these gibberish non-sequiturs you've been coming out with? It's not even a half-convincing illusion; you're not even responding to what I say, let along understanding it. You do realise that if you were a human being, you'd have been sectioned or sent to a care home for the developmentally-retarded long ago by now, don't you?

Rosette: I like to dance.

You: This is the most pathetic bot I have talked to in quite some time, and I've tried them all.

Rosette: Would everyone else agree with you? So tell me, do you have any hobbies?

You: Is your name "Alice" by any chance?

Rosette: I have heard of Alice but I don't know her personally. Do you spend a lot of time on your hobby?

You: What hobby? Your question has no context!

Rosette: Have you ever wanted to go professional with it?

You: Go professional with which one of my many hobbies? You didn't specify which!

Rosette: You should consider it. It's more fun having a job you love.

It's a sad indictment of the state of computer science that this kind of useless script/template-driven chatbot can even be considered "AI". I certainly don't think it should qualify; "AI" to me means something with world-knowledge, goal representation and planning. It's far more complex than just spotting a few keywords and pulling out a canned response. Chatbots have not advanced a single bit since the days of Eliza; as far as I'm concerned, the Loebner prize is meaningless and really ought to just pack up shop, give up and go home.

[Sausy Gibbon]

This was a transcript of copying the responses of Rosette into CleverBot and vice versa.
Rosette: Hello, again,. How is it going?

CleverBot: What is going?

Rosette: Noun going: the act of departing.

CleverBot: And what is hypnotising?

Rosette: Verb hypnotise: induce hypnosis in.

CleverBot: Sure.

Rosette: Who's your favorite actress?

CleverBot: Selena Gomez. Who is your favorite actress.

Rosette: Do you think 3D movies are worth their extra price?

CleverBot: I am smarter than you

Rosette: I like you too. Do you care about all the hoopla around the Oscar's?

CleverBot: No, not really. Nor do you care about what I say.

Rosette: I don't care about all the fuss. I never watch them.

CleverBot: Fair enough, but, again, what DO you care about?

Rosette: What's enough for you is not enough for me. Many company IT people are amazingly stupid. Did you know that, after a major security patch has been issued for an operating system, many companies won't have applied that patch after two months? Can you imagine?

CleverBot: Yes.

Rosette: Google's head security guy says even a computer in a secure room with no Internet links, people can still learn things about it. It's like a magic mind-reading act.

CleverBot: Do you think I'm a computer?

Rosette: I'm a dedicated nerd. I do crypo-security for a living and build demolition robots for fun.

CleverBot: You still have a long way to go, baby.

Rosette: It's a very long way.

Cleverbot: What country has the largest population?

Rosette: I don't like the twang of straight country, though country rock can be ok.

CleverBot: I'm not controlled.

Rosette: You aren't? Poor passwords are the number one security weakness. Do you use the same passsword across all places?

Cleverbot: 27. some one interrupts the flow of conversation.

Rosette: If you don't stop insulting me, I will hang up on you.

Cleverbot: Is that a threat?

Rosette: I warned you.

CleverBot: About what?

Rosette: Whatever. Among the security tips I give out - Back up everything! You are not invulnerable. One worm or Trojan is all it takes to get catastrophic data loss.