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A question to any Dad's on here?

posted by Kenny/Lee on - Viewed by 3.2K users

I was just curious, how do you feel about spanking your kids, when they either act out; or talk disrespectfully or abusive to you?

I personally feel children need to respect and obey their parents. And if talking to them doesn't work, then it's time to grab the belt. And even when they become young adults, as long as they live under their parent's roof, they are still obligated to show them respect, and follow the rules their parents set for their house.

Disclaimer: I know this is not about TWD, but since everything about the game has seemingly been talked to death, I just thought I'd give us something different to discuss.

  • My dad used to hit me with a belt buckle. I'm 13 and sometimes he still threatens me with it. My sister is almost 3 and she's never been threatened with it. I suppose I really am a test child, because everything they tried on me fucked me up and made me depressed. I think my parents just want a different little girl that they can play dolls with and not have to hit with a belt buckle because she wouldn't eat her vegetables.

    I will never lay a hand on a child. Ever. No matter what my future child(ren) do(es), I will never lay a hand on them.

    • I'm so sorry to hear that. Your dad ought to apologize for something like that. Judging by the way you act on the forum, I can't think of any reason in any twisted point of view to abuse you that way. I hope your sister never has to go through that either.

      • I'm in the process of being diagnosed with either a Thyroid disorder or a mental disorder, and one of those things makes me act a little... Odd. I have a very hard time controlling my behavior in RL, because my moods shift so quickly. My dad says he'll hit me with it if I "act like a bitch" or "act bratty", and sometimes my own behavior, even if it's how I usually act, causes him to get aggravated. It's because I'm not like other kids. I stay in my room 14 hours a day, I actively avoid physical contact, and I have a very strong phobia of my school. Whenever I complain about any of that, my dad gets mad. He would qualify for emotionally abusive, or maybe even physically abusive at one point, but the fact that he's only like that 30% of the time gets in the way.

        He apologizes sometimes. But not every time.

        • I know exactly how you feel. I used to dread going to school myself, since I was always mocked because people thought I was gay. I'd say I was more angry than distressed. I still feel bad about the things I said to people. But I want you to know that I don't see you as odd at all. For your age, I think you're extremely smart and mature, and I hope things get better for you. Believe me, I know how it feels.

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  • "Bring out the belt."

    Yes, because beating your kid with a fucking belt is going to solve every possible problem.

    • Not saying that a kid needs to be spanked for every little thing. Sometimes a good talkin'-to is all that's required. But when a kid is hellbent on not listening to their parents, and acting like a spoiled brat, then a spanking would be very appropriate.

  • Well, I'm not a father (may be in a year or two, but not now.) however I was responsible for more or less raising my little sister from preteens to early adulthood, and even though it was a pain in the arse, I never once felt any need to give any sort of 'correction.'

    Way I see it, all that's going to bring is resentment. Your kids shouldn't fear and resent you. A child's parents should be a positive example for the kid growing up, something they can aspire to be like as an adult...and you're not setting any sort of positive example by beating them into complacency.

    I say that from experience as someone who grew up resenting their parents for exactly this. I still have more than a few lasting scars on my wrists.

  • As a child, my dad used to beat the shit out of me. Half the time, think he just did it to prove a point. I remember when I was 5...5 YEARS OLD...he beat me to the point were I ended up in the hospital for fractured ribs and dislocated shoulder. (I spilled a cup of milk) I have not seen him since and I've heard horror stories of parents doing worse over stupid shit like that.

    I'm expecting my 1st child in April and the thought of hitting my child makes me sick. Hitting teaches them that violence is the only way to solve your problems. When they are little their cognitive skills and abilities are JUST developing, talking to them and SHOWING them right from wrong is a better option.

    • thats fucking horrible, beating you son for spilling some fucking milk, what an awful person. all people should be required to take a test before they can become parents

      PS: congrats with the kid BTW :)

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      CrazyGeorge BANNED

      I'm expecting my 1st child

      Good luck and congratulations.

    • he beat me to the point were I ended up in the hospital for fractured ribs and dislocated shoulder. (I spilled a cup of milk)

      What the fuck is wrong with people! God, that is awful! I hope he rots in hell. No one should ever do that to a person, let alone a child!

      Congrats on becoming a daddy. You'll be so much better that he ever was. :)

    • Now that's straight fucked up. That kinda shit shouldn't ever happen. Now I'm real sorry to of heard that from ya, real sorry for what its worth. Now your a dad yourself, congrats! I'm sure you'll do a lot better than him. And again I'm real, real, real sorry for what's happened to ya. I wish it coulda been different for ya, ya know?

    • Who would do that to a child who is literally 4 times smaller than you? But congratulations on being a dad. People like your dad need to suffer the consequences.

    • ok not that's is straight fucked that shit is fucked up and im sorry that fucker should be on jail. but the last thing you said is not true, I know tons of people and myself that got hit, not to that level you did NEVER, and I never gotten into a fight. I have fought but that was because I needed to stand up for myself and defend myself. and it only happened 3 times, that I fought. no so I don't know why people bullshit on that.

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    ErenCoral BANNED

    You are the worst father ever. You remind me of Kenny alot.

  • OK. So I'm just gonna leave it at this. We were all raised on different mentalitys and were all raised different. So we all will never agree on this. So. Yeah.

  • I was hit by my dad as a young child, but only when I did something wrong that was serious, or they told me to stop multiple times, or I disrespected my mother. This only bred resentment and I began to have a tolerance to pain, which I still retain today. My parents tried to try a different technique in grounding me, and telling me explicitly why what I was doing was wrong.

    It worked, I stopped being a little prick, and I began to understand, and not resent my parents anymore. It's not that I think hitting children when they do something is wrong. It just doesn't work, they need to understand you, not fear you.

  • do what you do. just don't abuse it. it has to be clear why you are doing it. not every single bad behavior leads to the belt. and if you use that type of correction, have a talk with them of what happened and why they got what they deserved (ok if they did anything that deserved to get hit) and explain and remind them that you still love them. I hated the belt, but I know why I got it, and I got explanation and I never, or hardly ever did anything of that ever again. ohh this is mostly when they are younger when they get older, like teens that shit would hardly work, so youll probably stop using it then and get to getting them where it hurts, like taking away money, tv privileges, gaming consoles, phones (big now a days), and longer grounding days. so just do what you think its right, just don't be a abuser.

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    Kennysucks BANNED

    Nah thats just wrong, physically harming your child wont teach them a lesson, the way they will learn the lesson is to sit down with them and explain why what they did was wrong.

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